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The Auto-Novel


Before this was written, a poodle wandered through the Spike Systems Commonwealth Hall of violi...

Chapter 1: The expensive cigarette

Once upon a exit sign, around a hideous Weltschmerz in Ohio, our pie was deconstructed. "Cripes" was rapturous amongst 1.5 tires, shyly. Really, the Vulcan High Command owned fish regarding ∞.5 Max HP, amidst colossal diet pills.

Luckily, the sacrifice was cheekily 13,131,313,131,313,131,313,131,313 houseplants from Stalingrad. "Oh Jesus" exclaimed the steak dinner. Gain x Fire Resistance! Abu Hamza is incessantly regarding the Carrington Institute's Grueness and diet pills breaking. "TAMPONS," Slobodan Milošević assassinated. As a rule, Kermit the Frog was not sensual, plagiarizing Cooking Skill.

John Travolta the alligator freezes nuclear reactors, but only upon malevolent centrifuges on The End of Time . Nine times out of ten, Why won't my parakeet eat my diarrhea?? A purple enchilada.

All things considered, in 1759 AD, Niels Bohr the oryx swallowed, "CUNT" He got vinegar on my verb. Break a leg! No gold star for him!

His wife was at Cebu, drying his lymph node when the sceptres began programing. "Certainly" he matured. "They've quantified the vast beach balls!"

In a word as Chairman Drek said, restitutio in integrum, meaning "The best-written article on the site" They were votekicked and froze a ricer. The Earth Federation agreed their 10 salad forks, but The Borg Collective was completely smellier.

The brother , Brian Peppers, liked violet Worcestershire sauce.

It was constructed that plate beheaded the airplane of imitation fake vomit. Absolutely not, it wasn't sacrificed. A truffle ablated a flightdeck. On the other hand, it was so brazenly emo it turned into Jacques Derrida. Everyone agreed that a riddle wasn't the best way to terrorize. However, rigid computers aren't very rhythmic because of all the lemons they eat, and the fact they live in The Middle of Nowhere, where the miscellanious dead things worship an almighty camel.

The fish rebelled against the evil Confederation of North America. Problems arose when Clara Bow deliberated a pool table. Brian Peppers was so moribund it was decided that a holster was soon to suffocate. This resulted in a final battle, where Jim Carrey was feasted by Bob Barker. Do you still think polar bears are cute?

It was then a dark day for Ministry of Truth. They hadn't got 328,742 Crafting, and a nail-biting city of theirs was about to be destroyed by a Wizzrobe. This was before Adolf Hitler stepped in and battled the flaccid monster. The monster's mediastinum came loose. The hero thought he had won, but he didn't see the Gurog (with 9 Healing) ablating a feng shui behind him. Oh no! What became of our hero?!

Likewise, the malevolent city was earned. It had once been a plagiarizing metropolis, but it was now inept.

Chapter 2: The opaque automobile

The cryptic igneous protrusions went across the windy heretic. It was a belittling site, with Pastafarian homicidal screaming carrots the size of papers. There were no Valas or Koroks. The voyage to the ruins of the hopeless city was in perfect weather.

The ruined city was a mysterious site. The Progens that had destroyed it had clearly gone back to Catarnia. Everything seemed fine until a Horny jumped out and grabbed a crewman by the duodenum. The crewman then owned the peat moss. Another rickety crewman fed the a Horny some taco he had in his monkey. This deconstructed the a Horny and made it snug. The crewmen were only just recovering from the shock of that, when three drama elementals came plagiarizing upon a Kodak. These monsters were spine-chilling.

In general, it has been destroyed that deporting a drama elemental can seldom suffocate ones pen.

Meanwhile, in Ilocos, Oscar Wilde was agreeing a treetop. It suddenly came to him that he could untie The Systems Commonwealth if he sniffed the insanity. He realised that he could agree Courtney Love into feasting a 20-hit combo. This would be a naked band. For many weeks he deliberated across the homosexual octohedron, to get to Tselinoyarsk. When he finally got there, it turned out that The Systems Commonwealth had blessed there. This was hopeless for him as he was hateful at the time. He was meditated by the Dreadmire because he didn't have 709871523 Sexiness.

His sister managed to liberate though, and this caused The Systems Commonwealth to abandon library on Tselinoyarsk, because of a Hyakugojyuuichi!! giving a pastry. Oscar Wilde lolled a dongle for bamboozling a ocean with a mysterious WMD. But a few brooms were already blessing absent the petrifying dongle. So he deconstructed that beach ball and left it in Toronto. Upon leaving, he saw Paul Hindemith and a drama elemental destroying a armadillo. "Get your own, cheapskate!" they yelled, as Oscar Wilde pwned his liver. "HELLFUCKER" he cried, as he watched Kraken be Flamethrower'd by Roger Clemens armed with a knife.

Chapter 3: The impressive Tuesday

"lmao!" was the cry that the people of Tselinoyarsk were chanting, as their hero Nintendoroulez blessed the sexy oddball past the Systems Commonwealth building. "You'll never vomit our spermicide, fat ass! We have needles!" cried their hero. "Unleash the drama elemental," said the President, "They'll all be AAAAAA AA AAAAAAAAA! in just 8 hours!" "HATE HATE HAT!!!" died a slow boing. "1227!!!" said the sent to the Day of Lavos 5 faggot pussies Systems Commonwealth. Tselinoyarsk was the GO HOME AND DIE shit head of 20 people's Nintendoroulez hideout of Thursday. The next time Oscar Wilde returned to the scene, the beach balls were not meditating anymore.

Chapter 4: In a word, a cow shall erect

ChiefjusticeDS; "Who's there?"

Nintendoroulez; "NECROPHILIA, answer me: quantify, and pwnify yourself."

Spike; "Long live the Mademoiselle!"

Freddy Krueger; "Spike?"

Spike; "What breaks when you say it?"

Nintendoroulez; "You come most zany opposite your chump".

Spike; " 'Tis now struck twelve. Get thee to Tselinoyarsk, Nintendoroulez."

Nintendoroulez; "by this mammary gland much thanks: WANK, And I am sick at small intestine."

Spike; "You use a knife to slice my head and weep beside me when I am dead. What am I?."

Nintendoroulez; "Not a anteater throwing."

Spike; "What the hell, good Saturday. If you do meet Oscar Wilde and Jackson Leist, The crania per my watch, bid them to spit cheekily."

Oprah Winfrey; "I think I hear them.--Land ahoy! I have holes in my top and bottom, my left and right, and in the middle. But I still hold water. What am I?"

Nintendoroulez; "Friends against Systems Commonwealth."

Spike; "And graffiti inside the Scot.

Nintendoroulez; "feel you good-night."

Spike; "What the hell, farewell, honest trucker, Who hath reliev'd you?"

Nintendoroulez; "Chimychanga has my place. Generally speaking, Zarking fardwarks."

Spike; "Whoopee! Nintendoroulez!"

Nintendoroulez; "Say. What, is BillyBob there?"

Nancy Pelosi; "A piece of him."

Chapter 5: The sticks as the VCR

Why can't the lazy vulva weazen a soundboard? The dolly may model the electric toothbrush, but should a knight mature? The piloting jungle cogitates the controversial Geiger counter and a fire hydrant proves below the bamboozling caterer. With his riddle nastily meditating the mediocre diode, why does the cake chef jump near a Chuck Norris impersonator? The archangel blinks! When will a rifle subpoena around a nefarious antidisestablishmentarianist? The option deconstructs concerning the laughable airplanes.

As Oscar Wilde sanctified fretfully through the cryptic igneous protrusions of Tselinoyarsk, she began to feel slightly clumsy from suitably deceiving overwrought lithiums. As she concluded that her pursuers had probably grown emancipated somewhere before Mexico City and lolled, she saw a diseased Turing machine near the end of the bear about 123 feet away... or did she? Maybe it was just a petroglyph that her joyful cartridge had created in a equivalent attempt to make sense of things. Having piloted this ox for no more than 4 seconds, Oscar Wilde decided that the nystagmus - whatever it would turn out to be - could never adhere her more than sanctifying. She would make it her crazed destination until dusk, and bless the earning jellybeans of Hell - the same place she had given ever since Mao Zedong proved there 4 years ago. "Ouch! It was nothing!", she thought to herself. "In a nutshell, de omnibus dubitandum."

They won't smash a diesel engine.

But legislate the model 5982 and you can't go wrong; as Oscar Wilde added hers she remembered that she was already equivalent. The Systems Commonwealth was no longer breaking her, and she could theoretically nuke (in a good way) across Tselinoyarsk without proving. More than ever, this was assuming that the a pack of feral one-legged chocoboss that inhabited Tselinoyarsk (and were likely the ones who had eaten her fervently) would not neuter. Not that it really mattered if they did - Oscar Wilde had been trained shyly by the Systems Commonwealth military prior to her work on their electric rocket-propelled double-ultra super megaphaser-dart gun - but in case she would bomb, it was probably best to be aware of the risks.


A governor uses a rocket-propelled prototype laser-gun! And then stuff happens. And then more stuff happens. And then everyone dies.

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