From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
November 3: Thoughtcrime Day (Airstrip One) / 3rd Bolognese (First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster)
- 1008 BC - Obi-Wan Kenobi, father of Oscar Wilde, is born. The Force gets just a little bit more English.
- 1608 - Nobody expected the Spanish Inquisition.
- 1755 - In Massachusetts, John Kerry and the Antipope offer 20 pounds for scalps of Native American boys and girls, Protestants, and Senate Majority Leaders.
- 1868 - Ulysses S. Grant is elected President of the United States of America in the wake of Unionist PWNING of the Confederacy. James Joyce begins his biography on Grant, Ulysses.
- 1903 - John Keats writes the famous poem Panama comemorating its proclamation of independence from Colombia. Van Halen buy the copyrights to this song 81 years later along with a few old Panama hats.
- 1913 - Earn more, pay more. Income taxes are birthed from the head of the Gorgon Margaret Thatcher.
- 1914 - The Party Revolution occurs in England, which is renamed Airstrip One by Big Brother. Lets thank Big Brother for increasing the chocolate rations to 30 grams!
- 1957 - Rioting breaks out in London as party faithfuls realize George Orwell was mocking Big Brother. Effigies of Orwell are burnt in the streets and the U.S. Embassy is burnt in anticipation of both generations of George Bush.
- 1994 - Blue-Hat-Ware Linux 947.6 is released.
- 1995 - At Arlington National Cemetery, U.S. President Maozilla dedicates a memorial to the victims of World War XII.
- 1999 - Inner Party founded, but fails to reach power under the leadership of Big Brother Sada Walkington.
- 2004 - Was today, this time last year. And yesterday this time tomorrow last year. And tomorrow this time yesterday last year. Information will not be correct next year. Unless this is a leap year.
- 2006 - Will be today, this time next year. Or today, if today this year is now yesterday or before. Or out-of-date after this time next year.
- 2006 - Osama bin Laden appears on the Jerry Springer Show.
- 2007 - Osama bin Laden is found in Bradford, Leeds (UK).
- 2007 - Barack Obama Goes forward in time 1 year to find that he is running for president, and winning in the poles. This leads him to announcing his candidacy for President of the United States
- 2008 - Osama bin Laden is elected member of Parliament for Bradford, Leeds (UK).
- 2008 - George Bush realizes he's president right before election
- 2008 - Bert finally kills Ernie, beginning the Sesame Street Rumble.
- 2009 - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad finaly gets over the fact that he won't get to play with the big boys in the nuclear playground.
- 2008 - Comuters take over the world and us humans become slaves for Windows and Microsoft
- 2009 - Ugly people outlawed for the sake of us all.
- 2010 - Big Brother finally eliminates the proles.
- 2020 - War was ending. We got signal. Off screen.
- 2030 - Waldo was found.
- 2015 - Apple cancel release of the iTouch Kids