Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/November 15

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m (Nobody cares about your birthday, faggot. Also, it's "born", not "borned". Lrn2English.)
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Latest revision as of 22:14, November 2, 2011

Devil

Santa is the source of all iguana ailments.

November 15: Awareness in Iguanas Awareness Week begins

  • 1491 - Christopher Columbus arrives at the New World, only to be told that he is a year early.
  • 1533 - Francisco Pizarro arrives in Cuzco, Peru. He notices that the iguanas have unusually piercing stares.
  • 1683 - War undoubtably raged somewhere in Eastern, Western, Northern, or Southern Europe.
  • 1853 - Deep in the Amazon, Brazilian missionaries discover the phrase, "Cogito, ergo sum" scraped onto a tree, apparently by the claws of some medium-sized reptile.
  • 1941 - SS chief Heinrich Himmler orders the arrest and deportation to concentration camps of all homosexuals in Germany. The German Army, once the most fashionable in the world, soon find themselves poorly groomed and wearing fatigues that clash with their boots.
  • 1964 - Mary Poppins donates a spoon full of sugar and the handsome sum of 21 guineas to the Arthritic Iguana Foundation after her beloved pet Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious dies screaming and horribly from Mad Iguana Disorder, a disease closely related to Arthritic Iguana Ailment.
  • 1965 - Chips invented.
  • 1969 - Vietnam War: In Washington, D.C., 250,000-500,000 iguanas stage a peaceful demonstration against the war.
  • 1982 Wikipedia destroys the Andromeda Galaxy. (sight of the destruction has not been seen yet due to the slowness of light speed)
  • 1990 - Producers acknowledge that Milli Vanilli, who won the 1990 "Best New Artist" Grammy Award, did not sing themselves on their album (the music was actually sung by a couple of iguanas).
  • 2001 - Microsoft releases the Xbox. The most popular game is Hi/Lo, a first person cooking game starring a cyborg known only as the "Master Chef". Set in a futuristic spaceship and challenging the player to serve up meals for an entire ship, sometimes using alien cooking implements, the game is regarded as a classic in the "First Person Cooker" genre.
  • 2002 - Harry Potter takes over the world for a second time and earns a total gross of 98.3 quadrillion dollars.
  • 2006 - Santa continues to plot total world domination.
  • 2016 - 84% of Americans suffer from thumb arthiritis due to excessive use of the text message.
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