1992 - Michael Jackson re-releases 'Bad' as Rad, however no-one is impressed when it is just the same track with Rad replacing Bad in the lyrics, and the song did very badly. This caused him to turn a paler shade.
1993 - The sun tells scientists it and earth should "just be friends." The sun promises to call every few weeks.
1994 - Tears for Fears reach Number One on new show Top of the Flops. They would have reached No. 1 on Top of the Pops, it was later revealed, but they failed to say 'rad' during the entire song.
2000 - 'Rad Day' is abolished after the phrase isn't considered rad anymore.
2004 - The sun tells Al Gore to fuck off with his global warming shit, and proceeds to call Gore a "jive turkey sucka."
2005 - Rick James dies of chronic diarrhea… Finally!
2006 - A rerun of the smash hit TV show "Full House" is shown around the world. Millions kill themselves, unable to stand the torture.
2007 - 'Rad Day' returns for one year with a concert featuring Michael Jackson. The 10 people that attended said things were 'Like, well rad init'.
2008 - After numerous requests by the American public, God finally damns it. It is never seen again.