- 1138 - George Lucas devises the evil world conquering plan of THX.
- 1269 - King Louis IX of France orders all Jews found in public without an identifying yellow badge to be fined "if they want to be fined, but really, if they want trouble, run away quickly, cause I think they breathe fire and stuff"
- 1443 - Graham The Bastard is crowned King of Ireland
- 1770 - Somebody says "Jesus is coming soon". His followers are still waiting.
- 1776 - In the beginning of the American Revolution, Boston Herald proclaims: "HOLY SHIT! WE'RE WINNING!"
- 1792 - Puzzle potato officially missing from French treasury.
- 1816 - William Henry Webb is born. Vows to make a world wide name for himself. Invents extremely silly game.
- 1865 - Slaves in Texas finally figure out that they're free, only two years after being told so.
- 1866 - Slaves in Texas, after much debate, decide to go back to being slaves because they don't know what else to do.
- 1867 - Slaves in Texas realize that they can breathe fire and shoot lasers out of their eyes, and soon proceed to take over the Bush administration.
- 1943 - Race wars are held Beaumont, Texas, leaving the tally: Whites – 287; Everyone else – 0
- 1953 - The Rosenbergs commit suicide by electric chair in Sing Sing Sing Prison.
- 1980 - Freddy Mercury spies a silouette on the wall.
- 1983 - Batman has New Years Eve Party at Wayne Manor. In attendance are Spiderman, Superman, and Wonder Woman among others, but a lonely Bruce Banner is left out of the loop.
- 1984 - The Incredible Hulk is born.
- 1987 - Kool Aid is first conceived by Elvis Costello.
- 1989 - Hamburger Helper slaps Chef Boyardee; Valachi family outraged
- 2007 - Gary Coleman's low budget commercial is aired on ABC
- 2008 - Jamie Lynn Spears gives birth to bastard daughter, Maddie
- 2009 - Osama Bin Laden voted biggest dick in universe for ninth straight year.
- 2010 - Neo enters the Matrix again. Changes back to Mr. Anderson.
- 2011 - The exact day that the June 19, 1867 entry was made.
- 2012 - The one year anniversary of the June 19, 1867 entry. But who cares, "2012" would have already happened.
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