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- A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away.... - The evil armies attack, and only a hero can save the light side.
- Once upon a time - A young girl, living in poverty, met Prince Charming and they lived happily ever after.
- 50BC - Nero plays the violin while Rome burns.
- 42- Something happens.
- 69- Two people have sex in a kinky position.
- 1110 - Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved before.
- 1111 - Besides, there's plenty more fish in the sea.
- 1268 - A battle of epic proportions occurs. The bad guys lose and the Half-good guys win. Our heroes from the future find themselves trapped in this age of rape and plundering, and just as they are to be executed for public fornication, the funky professor back in the future figures out a way to save them, and bring them back.
- 1337- Awesome shit happens.
- 1859 - Abraham Lincoln fights his evil twin.
- 1875 - Oscar Wilde says something that touches each and every one of our hearts.
- 1939-1945 The bad guys are a bunch of Nazis. Wow, that's really original.
- 1945 - President Truman considers bombing Japan with the A-bomb. "It's crazy", he says, "but just crazy enough to work."
- 1960 - The first American movie is released involving guns, aliens, tits, love-triangles, dinosaurs, Mars, and a young misfit whose strange talent is needed to save the world.
- 1979 - The Japanese release their first movie, game, book, and porno where key characters die for shock-value. Survival rate of Japanese characters lowers to 10%
- 2003 - America liberates Iraqistan to bring freedom to the Arabs. The liberal media rejects patriotism.
- 2006 - The anniversary list once again becomes a chat room.
- 2007 - You wake up, and it was all a dream.
- 2010 - Aliens invade, but they have a hidden weakness which is discovered just in time.
- 2011 - Aliens invade again. Different aliens. We shoot the mother ship with a one in a million chance of it hitting. It hits.
- 2017 - A rag-tag misfit with his own set of rules is persuaded to help the police track down the kitten ripper bandit in order to buy his own freedom.
- 2101 - War was beginning.
- 2242 - Uruguay changes its name to UrJustinBeiberTwilightfagharrypotterbananasplitlover
- 2407 - Super Mario made an apperance in his 1,309th video game entitled "Mario saves the Princess, AGAIN." It never gets old does it?
- +9000 - Vegeta finally gets the même about his catchphrase