- 2303 BC - Hallmark announces December 25 as International Day of Christmas.
- 6 BC - 6 AD - Jesus is born (nobody knows exactly when, the Bible does not mention), Christmas Zero is a huge success. Boxing Day sales start early. Astrologers around the world rejoice.
- 1337 - Time for a plagarized, boring, cliched, 1337 reference! L0L!!1!ONE@
- 1946 - The Doctors' Trial (for crimes committed during episodes of Doctor Who), begins at the BBC.
- 1958 - The John Birch Society is founded to fight the perceived threat of certain types of trees.
- 1960 - Coronation Street makes an unwanted appearance on British television for the first time.
- 1967 - Canada invades Greenland, prompting what most historians regard as the most boring war in the history of mankind.
- 1976 - The CIA fabricates much of the Western United States from Balsa wood and duct tape.
- 1982 - December 8 outstays welcome.
- 1984 - Miracle happens, six people amazed.
- 1990 - Lieutenant Planet promoted to Captain. Cartoon capers ensue.
- 2000 - Miracle fails to happen, thousands amazed.
- 2005 - Yahoo! acquires del.icio.us, thousands amazed.
- 2006 - Google acquires Uncyclopedia in retaliation. Nobody cares.
- 2078 - With the use of the Large Hadron Collider, Man successfully divides by zero, resulting in a rip in the Space Time Continuum, thus ending the world. God said to be pissed.
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