Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/April 6

April 6: Arson Wednesday in the Nihilist Church of New Zealand

• 648 BC - Earliest solar eclipse first recorded by Ancient Greeks quickly followed by large earthquake, suicide, and disease.
• 1 AD - Baby Jesus flips off a goat, and the judges give him a 9.65.
• 612 - Arab popstar Mohammed declares he is more popular than Jesus now.
• 1522 - Mary had a little lamb. Yankee Doodle claims to be father.
• 1593 - John Greenwood, English Congressionalist, hanged. His last words: "Get this fucking rope off of me!"
• 1895 - Oscar Wilde was arrested in London for "acts of gross indecency". You can't make this stuff up.
• 1896 - First modern olympic doping scandal discovered at Athens games.
• 1900 - 20th Century is first described as "the worst ever".
• 1999 - Chinese Democracy is released and subsequently pulled off shelves after the US Gov't denies reports of its existence.
• 1917 - The USA declares war on germs.
• 1934 - The first perpetual motion machine goes on sale in Pennsyltucky.
• 1935 - AT&T formed. Its first disgruntled customer is created moments later.
• 1955 - Hell freezes over, Devil skates to work.
• 1957 - Three children die in Nuclear Attack after trying to hide in fake refrigerators.
• 1985 - Video gaming is first cited as a precursor to juvenile delinquency.
• 1992 - Fire reinvented due to poor quality performance.
• 1992 - Isaac Asimov's batteries finally wear down. Perhaps the world's most famous robot, Asimov served more than 20 years on the [U.S.S. Enterprise]] under Captain Picard.
• 1994 - Kurt Cobain's attempt to win a posthumous Grammy backfires tragically.
• 1994 - Cyprian Niayamira, president of Burundi (1993-94), assassinated.
• 1998 - Tom Jones Industrial Average closes above 9,000 for the first time.
• 1999 - Billy Joel begins to amass his mole army beginning his inevitable rise to world domination.
• 2009 - The creation of the Snuggler - to help solve world problems and heal terminally ill people back to health by snuggling.