- 1026 - The first casualty in the on-going Pirate-Ninja War of the Ages occurs.
- 1794 - The Battle of Cat Boulou is fought. The French actually win one.
- 1889 - Hitler rises.
- 1945 - Hitler falls.
- 1959 - Grandpa drops a mento into his glass of coke. Huge catastrophe occurs.
- 1962 - Four legs found to be good, with two legs considered less favourably.
- 1969 - Vietnam Vets declare "You weren't there man!" for the first time.
- 1989 - Some proles invent "New Wave of Ingsoc Heavy Metal" Minitrue approved , with BB. , doubleplusgood.
- 1997 - I for one welcomed our insect overlords.
- 2001 - HAL declares "I'm sorry, Dave, but I cannot touch this."
- 2005 - Frank Joseph Snape gets away with the murder of ex-girlfriend Debbie Dumbledore, despite the fact that everybody already knew about it.
- 2010 - '1001 things to do with a flaming appendage' ousts the bible as the most famous and successful book of all time.
- 2019 - Road Rules Mars begins broadcasting, MTV immediately cancels the series after all participants including filming crew are killed by an asteroid.
- 2056 - Harry Potter dies after a long battle with imaginary herpes!
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