UnSignpost

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{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/menu}}
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{{UnSignpost:menu}}
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{{title|UnSignpost Main Page}}
   
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{{Shortcut|[[USP]]; [[Unsignpost]]}}
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<div align="center"><span style="font-family: cursive, sans-serif; font-size:500%; line-height:200%">The UnSignpost</span></div>
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<div align="center"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:110%; line-height:100%">{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/slogan}}</span></div>
   
{{Shortcut|[[Unsignpost]]<br />[[UN:USP]]<br />[[USP]]}}
 
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:250%; line-height:100%; font-weight:bold;">The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost</span>
 
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:90%; line-height:100%; font-weight:bold;">{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/slogan}}</span>
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's online news page, the UnSignpost! Find anything you want and don't want about what's happening on this site and elsewhere! News is updated here regularly <s>(every month)</s> giving you a minute by minute acount of the goings on in the Uncyclopedia community.
   
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<div align="center">[[UnSignpost:Current|Current Edition]]</div>
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:160%; line-height:100%; font-weight:bold;">UNSIGNPOST IS BACK!!!</span>
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{{USP body-left}}
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{{USP article|Top Story|Uncyclopedia's grand conspiracy|
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[[File:Illuminati Seal.jpg|left|180px]]
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'''By [[User:ScottPat|ScottPat]]'''
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Occasional Editors:''' [[Nobody]] &bull; {{u|ScottPat}} &bull; {{u|Anton199}} &bull; {{u|SPIKE}} &bull; {{u|Zim ulator}} &bull; {{u|Romartus}} &bull; {{u|PuppyOnTheRadio}} </span>
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In recent world news, violence has once again broken out between the countries of [[Palestine]] and [[Israel]] in what looks to be a prolonged spout of fighting over the land once again. As usual when world events happen like this people have been looking for the cause to the event and some have found the cause, surprisingly, to be [[Uncyclopedia]]. The violence was sparked off when two Israelis were found dead in Palestine in June of this year. At the very start of the month on 2nd June, the article [[Gaza War]] was featured. Coincidence? Was it just chance that Uncyclopedia featured an article on a previous conflict in the region just before a new one was sparked off? We think not.
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Joint Chief Editors''' {{u|ScottPat}} and {{u|Anton199}}</span>
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/Uncyclopedia's grand conspiracy|Read more...]]'''
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{{USP article|News Stories||
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[[File:WallOver.jpg|left|75px]]
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/A way out|A way out]]''' - Veteran archivist {{U|Anton199}} recently stumbled onto the special-page [[Special:CloseMyAccount]]. The existence of such an article is remarkable, as in the policy manual, no one's account is ever closed.
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Deputy Chief Editor''' ''VACANT''</span>
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[[Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/current|<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Click here to view the latest issue'''</span>]]
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[[File:JulyCoup.jpg|left|85px]]
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/Anniversary of the July Coup|Anniversary of the July Coup]]''' - T'was only a year ago that this newspaper was thrown into a ruinous [[civil war]], that would span the course of a month.
   
<small>[[Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Archives|<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Click here to rifle through our archives</span>]]</small>
 
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[[Image:Lost.png|thumb|right|No, not that type of signpost. Just as useful, though.]]
 
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">The '''UnSignpost''' is the way to stay informed about Uncyclopedia without actually getting involved with all the madness that goes on around here on a regular basis. It seeks to provide some of the most useless information on Uncyclopedia's so-called "community".</span>
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[[File:Clement and Judah.jpg|left|80px]]
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/The exodus continues|The exodus continues]]''' - Following the swan song of Abuse Filters 16 and 20 (see previous issue), the latest stalwart Uncyclopedian to leave is the Sprite. Our webhost [[Wikia]] is trying to get out of the stylistic shadows of Wikipedia...
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''If you sign up <big>[[/signup|HERE]]</big>'''</big>, <s>one of our paperbots</s> I will deliver a fresh copy of the UnSignpost straight to your talkpage every week <s>for just $5.99 a month</s>. In case you haven't got enough spam already.</span>
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{{USP article|Image Gallery|Image of the week!|
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[[File:Domokun-hat.gif|left]]
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<big>Visit our [[UnSignpost:Images|Image Gallery]]!</big>
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''Interested in adding something to the signpost?'''</big> Drop us a line in [[/Press Room|the press room]] and we'll either ignore it, forget about it (most likely), or add it into our next issue. Want to write an article? Go right ahead and give us a draft in the press room. Want to write a biopic? Good, add it to this page: [[Unsignpost:UserBiopics - 2013]]. Any questions? Ask an editor (preferably {{u|ScottPat}}).</span>
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{{USP article|Old|Archives|
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*[[UnSignpost:UnSignpost/20140520]] - 200!!!
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*[[UnSignpost:UnSignpost/20140328]]: Issue#199, carefully reporting everything that happened in the absence of the journalists
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*[[UnSignpost:Article]]: Check out our old '''and''' new articles to find out why we are not the same!
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{{USP article|UnSignpost|UnSignpost|
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If you have a desire to write an UnSignpost article that may well feature in an UnSignpost edition or the front page then please [[UnSignpost:Article|click here]].
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''Want to chat with the editors live?'''</big> Good luck with that. The chief editor is on here most days (British time).</span>
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<big>[[UnSignpost:Interview|Interviews with Uncyclopedians can be found here!]]</big>
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''Want to look through all our internal news?'''</big> [[Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/News|Check out this page!]]</span>
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<div style="width:50%; float:left;"><div style="margin-right:2em; margin-left:1.5em;">
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{{USP article|News Feed||
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*'''11th July''' - [[Forum:Happy Monkey Competition results]].
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*'''14th June''' - Happy Monkey competition begins today!
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*'''27th May''' - 200th UnSignpost edition released! YAY!!!
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*'''10th May''' - [[User:Dr. Skullthumper|Dr. Skullhumper]] co-founder of this great newspaper popped by today to tell people that even he had almost forgotten about Uncyclopedia. We wish him all the best with his ground that he wants to get off the company.
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*'''6th May''' - [[User:ScottPat|ScottPat]] has discovered on the forum, ''[[Forum:VFH vote box|VFH vote box]]'', that he can suddenly view a feature created many years ago visible under the UnSignpost nomination that has only just appeared for him after one year of editing.
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{{USP article|Competitions|Unhappy Monkey|
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Uncyclopedians who were paying close attention caught wind of an exciting, recurring writing competition, to be called the '''[[Forum:Happy Monkey 2014|Unhappy Monkey]].''' This is our [[UnNews:Wikia's new "Style" causes uproar|webhost]]'s latest writing challenge — that our authors (or "chimps") cease trying to replicate the masterpieces of Shakespeare, in order to devise clever "encyclopedia" articles with pleasing illustrations while being '''[[Forum:Thumbnails are broken|utterly unable to see how they will look on the page]].''' This is Wikia's most daunting challenge since 2012, when it dared us to put aside creative writing in order to scour the site for photos containing exposed nipples. Evidently, this challenge has no time limit, and awards, or at least templates containing photos of awards (which will not render correctly either) will be given to the winners of this contest, which at this writing looks like any Chimp who lasts until the end despite the lack of well-opposed thumbnails.
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{{USP article|[[Village Dump|Forums]]|Active Forums|
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#[[Forum:Sharing an article]] - are we going to promote Facebook and Twitter?
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#[[Forum:Construction template]] - work is in progress on a new design for the widely used template
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{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Template:News|News about different services|
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*With ChiefjusticeDS who came back, [[UN:PEE|Pee Reviews]] are written at least every two weeks. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't be helping him - on the contrary!
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*The [[Proofreading service|Uncyclopedia Comma Brigade]] does not seem to be active but any new members, who would like to participate, are strongly encouraged to enlist themselves, as well as any new articles to be proofread. We are not doing anything because we don't have enough work!
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*[[UN:AAN|The members of the Adopt-a-noob program]] are desperately trying to adopt someone.
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*[[VFP]] is now allowed to receive visits from friends and relations. Its state is stable and is improving.}}
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[[File:Lost.png|thumb|center|250px|No, not that type of signpost. Just as useful, though.]]
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'''Chief Editors''': [[User:Anton199|Anton]] and [[User:ScottPat|ScottPat]]
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(If you want to contribute to this page, either ask an UnSignpost Chief Editor or, if you are brave, do it without telling anyone.)
 
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Retired Founders & Co-Head Janitors:''' {{u|Dr. Skullthumper}} &bull; {{u|Cajek}}</span>
 
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Retired Founders & Co-Head Janitors:''' {{u|Dr. Skullthumper}} &bull; {{u|Cajek}}</span>
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</div></div>
   
[[Category:It's news because I say it's news]]
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{{UnSignpost}}
[[Category:UnSignpost]]
 

Latest revision as of 13:32, July 29, 2014

Home

The UnSignpost
Now With 0 Trans Fat!

Welcome to Uncyclopedia's online news page, the UnSignpost! Find anything you want and don't want about what's happening on this site and elsewhere! News is updated here regularly (every month) giving you a minute by minute acount of the goings on in the Uncyclopedia community.






Lost

No, not that type of signpost. Just as useful, though.

Chief Editors: Anton and ScottPat (If you want to contribute to this page, either ask an UnSignpost Chief Editor or, if you are brave, do it without telling anyone.) Retired Founders & Co-Head Janitors: Dr. SkullthumperCajek

The UnSignpost
DogNewspaper Articles List of all the articles · Press room
History Archives · UnSignpost's old format
For editors Help with the delivery · Help with Interviews
Biopics 2013 · 2014
Other pages Image Gallery · Subscribe! · Interviews themselves
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