- By Chief
Everything that has a beginning has an end, with the possible exception of the autobiography of Wayne Rooney; our literary correspondent was unable to complete it after an unfortunate fire rendered the text
The sun is now setting on the time of the temporary admins. For the last month, they have all been mucking in with the rest of the administrators and eating other people's biscuits at the weekly cabal meetings and now it is time for them to go. On Friday the bureaucrats will arrive and the mythical user rights log will appear on recent changes for the gratification of the eagle-eyed Uncyclopedian.
So how did they do? Sources close to the temporary admins have chosen to move further away because of the smell, so we haven't been able to ask them anything. The occupational hazard of needing to know things has never stopped the relentless march of journalism before, however, and today shall be no exception.
Hyperbole, the eternally wronged victim of Uncyclopedia, has been deleting and banning consistently over the last month and has generally been annoyingly useful. Reportedly he has been "asking questions" when he doesn't know something; clearly he is not sysop material.
Lyrithya has been the most visible temporary admin, and her screams at the last Cabal meeting as she was punished for deleting VFD were described as "Most invigorating" by Mhaille, who, due to the nature of that quote, has expressed a wish to remain anonymous. Curiously, despite her undiscriminating use of the delete button, Lyrithya seems inordinately keen not to ban users for long periods of time, citing "Feeling sorry for them" as her reason. Clearly she is not sysop material.
ChiefjusticeDS is a very delusional man.
Sockpuppet of an unregistered user has been a useful admin and, intelligently, has not drawn attention to himself; an ideal candidate for the mantle of sysop. He is, however, from Belgium; make of that what you will.
PuppyOnTheRadio doesn't know what a sysop is, but thinks that it would be a splendid way to spend an afternoon, so he has. He has been the least active of the temporary admins and thus is the most obvious candidate for induction to the order. He is Australian, by the way, from Australia. Ask him about his pet Kangaroo, he must have one, he is an Australian from Australia.
Olipro was good enough to give his thoughts to the UnSignpost, saying, "And thus, our great experiment in finding out what happens if you rig yourself to a bomb and give the detonator to a pack of monkeys is over." See you next week, hopefully April Fools Day will happen before then and it will be brilliant, because if there is one thing Uncyclopedia is not short of, it is fools.... and days for them to be fools on.
- By Chief
There is something in the air at Uncyclopedia - it's the smell of competition... and cheese. This is the news that over the next month there will be several competitions to encourage creativity and general brilliance from the community. The first of these is the second round of the hourly writing competition, the first round of which ran a couple of weeks ago. Entrants have an hour to write an article and then a further hour is given over to voting to delete or keep those articles. The last round ran very well, with the majority of the articles entered being kept as a result. If you want to take part in the second round then you only need to sign up here... and then turn up on Saturday.
The other competition is Zombiebaron's Imagery Extravaganza, a brand new competition surprisingly being run by Zombiebaron. It is very similar to the PLS and will hopefully encourage the creation of plenty of high quality images, which we can then delete and forget about.
So if you aren't planning on creating a single new article/image in the next few weeks and throwing it onto the great bonfire of creativity which, as we all know, is burning at the core of Uncyclopedia, then you should definitely think about it. Probably. Unless you don't want to, which is cool, I guess.
|From our logs:
- 17:01, March 28, 2011 ChiefjusticeDS (Talk | contribs) blocked 18.104.22.168 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 Days (AHA! I LOVE BANS *click* ooooh yeah, that's the good stuff right there)
- 13:47, March 25, 2011 Mhaille (Talk | contribs) blocked Nickyg94 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 3 months (please enjoy our complimentary fuck the hell off)
- 05:15, March 25, 2011 Zombiebaron (Talk | contribs) blocked 22.214.171.124 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week (If you love the Powerpuff Girls so much, why don't you marry them?)
- 05:24, March 25, 2011 Lyrithya (Talk | contribs) blocked 126.96.36.199 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month (If I was a real admin, I'd have some sort of witty block reason to back this up. So sorry.)
- 00:49, March 27, 2011 Dr. Skullthumper (Talk | contribs) blocked Springeragh nailed K. Lastochka's hands to the table and her feet to the ground, then Sceptre stripped her of her clothes and proceeded to rape her violently. (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 year (I'm kind of impressed you came back. See you next year!)
- 00:06, March 24, 2011 Zim ulator (Talk | contribs) blocked Zim ulator (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 days (The cabal wishes it: Wikicide. I shall rise again on the third day. Suck it, Jesus!)
|Biopic of the Week
Oliphaunte's arrival on Uncyclopedia has made several people very happy: Black flamingo11, because he can finally have the child he always wanted without any of that horrible fumbling about. ChiefjusticeDS is happy because he has someone to biopic this week, and everyone at PEEING is thrilled because there is finally some competition for the Reviewer of the Month trophy. However Oliphaunte has shunned the offering of awards and has focused solely on trying to help through his reviews, and amuse through his writings; truly a splendid fellow.
The non-existent Cabal, however, has expressed some non-existent concern at his disregard for the shiny baubles dangled before him; refusing awards on Uncyclopedia is like refusing a bagel in Israel. Highly suspicious behaviour. One for all
Mossad agents users to shoot on sight say hello to if they see him.
|Just so you know
Naruto is still made of fail.
|Reason to leave Uncyclopedia #1,234,546