Once again it is that time of year when we must take a day off to remember those who fought for the Rebels against the evil empire. As you know Uncyclopedia has a large Jedi community and to reach out to all our religious groups no matter how liberal they are we muast help them with their festivals.
What will you do on International Star Wars day? Perhaps you shall visit the temple and pray for the dead of Hoth? Perhaps you will use the force for good and strangle some politicians? Whatever it is that you want to do Uncyclopedia is there to support you.
One user who will remain nameless, is going to attempt to raise money for charity by speaking in Jedi for the whole day. The money he collects will go to Unsignpost the homeless hitch-hikers who are struggling to find somewhere to settle down after their home planet of Alderon was destroyed.
Nobody has been handing out welcome messages to people recently signed with different admins names and nobody was concered by the huge discussion on a forum about it. Nobody would like to apolagise for this because to be quite frank Nobody did it. Many admins were getting quite frustrated that Nobody had done it as they had wanted to do the welcome messages instead.
It was later discovered by Spike that it wasn't Nobody (Nobody disagrees) that had done it (excuse my grammar) but that it was an automated Wikia message. This has caused some members of our community to vent even more frustration with Wikia however this newspaper would like to point out that Wikia has done a lot to benefit us and Nobody agrees that the welcome message (and content warning) has been very useful.
The fact that the message has now been stopped is thanks to the admins sorting the problem out with Wikia so on this note Nobody would like to thank the admins for their help in running this site.
Also Nobody cares about UnSignpost and Nobody is moved that there are a lack of articles submitted to UnSignpost to be featured in the newspaper. UnSignpost would therefore like to remind you that it is vital to support your community newspaper as it supports the community.
Rumour has it that the co-editor of UnSignpost (Dannyboy) was recently banned from Uncyclopedia and is barely surviving in the miserable world of reality. He is currently traumatised and struggling to eat. He has had to cope with extreme poverty for many days.
UnSignpost has launched an appeal to help him in this time of sadness and depression: just a donation of £2 a month could help to restore Dannyboy to a fit and active state so that he is ready to continue Uncyclopeding again.
Please, please donate and don't let Dannyboy waste away, forgotten and unwanted.
"I thought I'd seen the worste [than this and I had.]"
"I didn't realise that people still read this [but then I realised how good it was]."
Biopic of the Month
Unfortunately due to lack of UnSignpost support there is no biopic for this week. Please send a biopic of yourself or someone you hate to our press room and it may feature in our next UnSignpost edition.