UnNews:World ends with no major news stories
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World ends with no major news stories
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Wednesday, June 29, 2016, 23:56:UTC)(
11 November 2006
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“We didn't really feel it was an important news story. People really don't care about the end of the world anymore. Hey, who farted?”
The media not only had a lack of news on the end of the world, but also struggled to find any interesting news stories to broadcast. The best they could do included The Sun's review of the movie Snakes on a Plane, an old guy bowling on his 80th birthday, and a cat getting stuck in a tree after listening to Kevin Federline's horrible CD.
There are many factors as to why Thursday was such a slow news day: It was reportedly Larry King's day off. There were no delevopments in the Britney Spears divorce. President Bush didn't do anything stupid. Nobody really cared about the Congressional election. And apparently, Chris Matthews was too bored to make up a news story to fill the void. Says Matthews, "I just decided to go home and take a long nap."
More details will be available as this story develops.