UnNews:WoW fans disappointed with Vista
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|This article is part of UnNews||Straight talk, from straight faces|
30 January 2007
VIVENDI, Paris (UnGame) — With Microsoft's Vista "The WOW starts now!" campaign, analysts estimate that 892 million WoW users worldwide clamoured or upgrades to their favorite software — only to be met by a wall of confusion.
"I thought we wuz gettin' more levels an' stuff!" Dwayne Picklesworth of Montana sulked. "I can't even install it and now my Blood Elf is dying!"
"Clearly, there's been some confusion in the marketplace, and we're investigating the possibilities," Tony Maiale of Blizzard Entertainment said. "Preliminary investigations suggest an attack from the state of Washington, possibly the Redmond area." Maiale denied speculation that the Mob are involved. "Oh you guys, you mean The Horde," he laughed. "It's too early to say at this point in time, but it looks like the work of a rival MMPORG maker attempting to muscle its way into WoW's territory."
"Ever since I bought then 'The Burning Crusade™' for Thanksgiving," says mother of two Emmylee Picklesworth, "they've been all 'Where's my WoW?' and 'I want my WoW.' So naturally, when they heard 'The WOW Starts Now!' I had to up their dose of Ritalin. Again. It's gettin' real hard to hide them pills in the burger-meat."
"Where's my gold? I been a-farmin' all day long," cried Dwayne's younger brother, Shelcomb. "This is the suck!" When the family heard that Microsoft were behind the "WOW Starts Now" campaign, Dwayne and Shelcomb were emphatic in their judgement of the company, crying in unison: "FAGLOLNOOBS!"
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|