UnNews:William Roache: Druid Don Juan guilty
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William Roache: Druid Don Juan guilty
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Saturday, March 25, 2017, 11:31:UTC)(
6 February 2014
Mr Roache, of Hoggle, Cheshire, was found guilty of paying for at least 19 dinners with single ladies, 53 ice creams with children, at least three known dinners at a table of three, two very large dinner parties and uncountable dinners with college girls on various campuses around the world. The judge lectured Roache that he has crossed the line too many times and that he really must let others pay for dinner once in a while.
In court, laughing maniacally when the verdict was given, he squealed: “I loved every minute of it, and I’d do it all again if you’d let me, yer bastards!”
His family of Druids cheered with relief as the verdict was read out, as they too had been abused for millennia.