UnNews:Wikipedia admin gets laid
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Wikipedia admin gets laid
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, May 24, 2015, 07:36 (UTC)
25 February 2007
BROOKLYN, NY - In a scientific breakthrough, in what once was considered in defiance of the laws of physics, a Wikipedia administrator got laid.
"Its unbelievable," Yaakov Amla, the 40 year old admin, told our reporter. "I never touched a boob, much less even knew what a vagina looks like." His mother's attic, which now is filled with the aroma of cheeze-doodles, sweat, and cheap perfume, has come to be considered his "babe-lair." "I plan on doing some banning tonight!" he said.
The woman he slept with says otherwise. "I was incredibly drunk." she said. "I mean, look at him. Who the hell would want to fuck that? Much less touch it? I hope worthlessness isn't transmittable."
While the future is unpredictable, some scientists feel this could have noticeable effects on Wikipedia. Now that he has gotten laid, its predicted that the wikinazi's sphinkter will loosen to a considerable degree. This would cause him to take life less seriously, with the result of a decrease in user-bans and unneccissary reverts. "This is a great day for Wikipedia" Stephen Ryans, a Wikipedia user, said at a press conference. "This could be the beginning of a new Wikipedian era, an era in which I can contribute something to an online encyclopedia without having to deal with douchebags."
Scientists do not expect that such a rarity will occur again in the near future.