UnNews:Web 2.0 Service Pack 1 to be released
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Web 2.0 Service Pack 1 to be released
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, August 28, 2016, 22:41:UTC)(
30 October 2006
Tim Berners-Lee, a spokesman for Al Gore, discussed the new features to a room full of computers. "We've fixed some serious bugs", he says, "but the real key benefits of the service pack are the new features. Web 2.0 Service Pack 1 provides Bacon as a Service, Community Vandalized Content, Folksingeronomies, and Imaginary Business Value." Berners-Lee also discusses how this service pack extends the broad variety of pornography available. His comments are not appropriate for this article, however. Titties.
O'Reilly is hoping that this service pack will propel the already popular Web 2.0 further into the spotlight. Some of his past products are long forgotten, and he doesn't want to repeat that. Says O'Reilly, "I don't want to relive the defeat experienced during the Gopher 2.0 days, nor will I want to fall into obscurity like I did with AJAX. No, not that one. You know, Asynchronous JCL And XModem?" This reporter did not know.
The service pack can be downloaded and installed voluntarily at this time, but will become a high priority automatic update for anyone using The Internet. Users are advised to visit their local pipe for download and install instructions.
When asked how many more service packs to expect before the release of Web 3.5, Berners-Lee had this to say: "How should I know? What, you think I have a road map for these types of things? Oh, I do? Hmm."
- Ivanna B. Yakinov "Immature Humor In The Form Of People's Names". Wild Wild West Consortium, January 31, 2001