UnNews:Vicious Fight Resolved With Apology
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Vicious Fight Resolved With Apology
Straight talk, from straight faces
Saturday, May 27, 2017, 13:54:UTC)(
27 April 2006
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Uncyclopedia Secret HQ - Earlier this week, a fight broke out between two members of Uncyclopedia resulting from the abuse from a somewhat unscrupulous individual, and another, whom had seen fit to attack Uncyclopedia, in yet another speight of vandalism - something far removed from the terrorist bombing of the server center.
The offended individual, known only as 'The Insane Jester' was caught by former news co-anchor Brad Phraser and subsequently merited some ritual abuse whilst reverting, in the form of offensive comments. However, it was only later that the vandal in question took offense at the comments, and resultantly demanded an apology from Mr. Phraser.
As a response to this, Mr. Phraser admitted himself to be the bigger man, and released the following apology;
"I am so sorry. You have no idea how upset your trolling has made me - Post-going-to-stop-no-for-really trolling.
I mean. When, in thirty years, I look back at all of my actions, I think this will be the one I regret the most. Calling that dumb-ass, cock-sucking, goat-screwing, cross-dressing transvestite vandal a "complete loser" in my edit summary. God, why did I do it? I don't even have an answer for myself. I think my great-grandfather, looking down on my from Heaven, has stopped screwing your great-grandma for a sec. and turned his eyes down upon my actions, wording a curse that would hurt our ears terribly if ever we heard them. I sincerely offer my heartfelt apologies for screwing your mother, but, in my defense, she's hot. You have to at least admit that.
I hope that all future dealings between us are on better terms than you vandalizing the site that I sometimes visit for fun, because, you just can't get off until someone else is as upset as you.
I offer you this link as a peace offering, so that we may foster better relations with your obvious writing talent in the future: goatse.cx Keep working on it, you'll be able to write soon enough, I'm sure!"
~ Brad Phraser on The Insane Jester
This apology was graciously accepted by the offended party, and thus closing yet another temporary rift between the officials of Uncyclopedia, and the underlings who merely take the time to visit the site and contribute, in their own, special, little ways. Also, we are proud to announce that Brad, in an exclusive interview with us stated;
“I hope we can go forward on the right foot from now on, that stupid mysogynistic prick”