UnNews:Unstable man arrested with weapons near K-2 summit
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
24 June 2010
PAKISTAN -- A 53-year-old man climbing the world’s most dangerous peak, K2, was arrested by mountain police with five cans of laughing gas and an array of deadly weapons near the K2 summit in Pakistan, security officials tell CNN's Jeanne Meserve.
K2 is a rocky mountain climb up to 6000 meters, which is a right-royal pain in the arse, and from then on it becomes extremely difficult. The K2 peak is situated on the Pakistan and China border in the Karakoram Range. The exact height of the peak is 8,611 meters or 28,251 ft.
K2 has variously been described as “fuckin’ awesome", "son-of-a-bitch" and "goddamn rude" mountain. This is because of its massiveness in size and the numerous unsuccessful attempts made on it by various expeditions, including a number of Polish expeditions which have made many unsuccessful attempts to reach base camp. K2 also has the local name "YAAAAAAAAA..." because of the sound most climbers make while descending.
Constable Samantha Khan, with the K2 Regional Police, told CNN an officer pulled over a suspicious climber and found the man had gas cans, a crossbow, a shot gun, an AK47 assault weapon, a catapult, a bag of bricks, 4 hand grenades, C4 explosive charges, a chain-saw, 6 hatchets, a winch, a Swiss army knife, a tooth brush, soap, canned food, toilet paper, and other weapons and cans filled with unknown substances.
Another official said that the man also had a Stinger missile, suspicious drugs and radioactive materials in his backpack as well. The official said, "police weapons teams are testing many of the items and drugs right now to determine if anything
gets you high is illegal in Pakistan. The Identity of the man is being withheld pending finding out who he is. So far we only know his age!"
At this point, Khan said there were no specific signs that the incident is linked to the K2 summit.
|"I can assure you that his being caught on the summit of K2 has nothing what-so-ever to do with the mountain!"|