UnNews:Uncyclopedia writers go on strike
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Uncyclopedia writers go on strike
A newsstand that's brimming with issues
Sunday, May 24, 2015, 11:41 (UTC)
6 November 2007
UNCYCLOPEDIA WRITERS have gone on strike (within minutes) after talks with Uncyclopedia representatives failed to resolve a dispute over free ice cream and lemonade. Pickets are to be set up outside thousands of PCs around the world, after the strike was called this morning.
Up to the microsecond misinformation outlet Unnews is likely to be the first production to suffer with the rest of Uncyclopedia to follow if the strike drags on for any longer than a few minutes. Hugh Jairyman, was vitriolic in his own support of the strike: "I want more ice cream, more lemonade AND I WANT IT YESTERDAY darlings!"
"I will not be typing another letter until our demands are met", Hugh Jairyman writes, "for too long we have been fed on a bland diet of vanilla or chocolate ice cream and cheapo own brand lemonade that goes flat within hours. Well NO MORE, we DEMAND a steady supply of Haagan Daas Rum and Raisen and Schweppes lemonade! and REAL Glasses... made from realistic looking recycled plastic"
Uncyclopedia management tried to placate anxious readers this morning: "it'll be business as usual folks, if we have to write this damn site ourselves then we will. We will not be intimidated by the greed of contributors to this site, blood sucking scum the lot of them! I mean, how hard can it be!? I can look at crap , swear my ass off, and talk about junk off WITHOUT lemonade."
...oh, its like that is it!?...bye then! (this has bin edited out due to huge doodie heads writing the article!)
The manglers decided to do writings insted uf hte righters when the stryk was begin. Fred Dynhurst who is won off the mane men round ear, says that "hey guys this easy as die, suckers!" (looks I kan evin do qwotes and italianix!). We no mind if foolish bumholes streak as this gig no problim at hall! PS put flowrs on Algernon's graiv plees.
It is thort dat the lazery basters will be bok too wuk before "two long." In the meantimings it is "bizzness in normals!" (looks I can alshow do bald tics!)