Uncyclopedia is better than Wikipedia
A newsstand that's brimming with issues
Tuesday, July 7, 2015, 07:12:UTC)(
19 June 2007
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WIKIA, The Internet -— After a series of tests, studies, surveys, and meetings, the Wikia Foundation has made the decision to move Uncyclopedia up on their list of Top 10 Wikis, finally surpassing Wikipedia, its parody (though Wikipedia claims the reverse), after years of close competition.
“It really was inevitable,” the Wikia Board of Directors said in their press release last week. “Not only has Uncyclopedia’s popularity been increasing drastically lately, but the overall quality of its articles has also steadily risen, and with the upcoming PLS drawing more reader attention, well, numbers don’t lie.”
Uncyclopedia, founded by Chronarion in 2005, has expanded constantly since and yielded brilliant examples of philosophy, science, literature, opinion, and just plain classic comedy. Most of the 56,032 registered users have contributed somewhat, and a few have distinguished themselves in some way. New articles continue to flood in daily, forum discussion is thriving, and ever-vigilant security has never been stronger.
Additonally, Uncyclopedia has been a reference for millions of children across the country, as most schools prohibit the use of viewing Wikipedia.
In contrast, Wikipedia has suffered a decline in readership lately. “I just don’t get it,” Wikipedia founder Jimbo Wales cried last Saturday. “We used to be great. We used to have power. You would think that 1,841,555 articles would count for something. We are Wikipedia- we're supposed to be like the Galactic Empire. Uncyclopedia isn't even a real encyclopedia, for crying out loud!”
“He’s just jealous,” was Chronarion’s public response the following morning upon hearing the news. “He gets like this every once in a while. Sometimes things at work will be too much for him, or it’ll be ’’that’’ time of month. Just give him some time, and this’ll blow over.”
Forums across the Internet became strongly divided after the public announcement of Uncyclopedia’s promotion. One side is celebratory and well pleased that Uncyclopedia is finally getting the attention it deserves. Opponents have taken up stubborn resilience to the change, claiming that Uncyclopedia “sucks” and “should go wallow in its own feces and expire”. Uncyclopedians have decided that nobody cares about these claims, and for the most part, they’re right.
“Just little kids,” an anonymous Uncyclopedian posted on a public forum regarding the comments. “Ignore them, don’t heckle them, and let them go back to their holes."
The Wikia Foundation will hold another board meeting this Friday, open to the public. Among the items in the agenda will be an analysis of public response to Uncyclopedia’s promotion, and consideration of further bestowing of honor on what is rapidly becoming “The World's Favorite Wiki”.
Encyclopedia Dramatica still remains safely at the bottom of the list.