UnNews:Uncyclopedia Blackout a Success
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Uncyclopedia Blackout a Success
Straight talk, from straight faces
Monday, November 30, 2015, 05:48:UTC)(
19 January 2012
UNCYCLOPEDIA, The Internet - In an unimaginable act of defiance, Wikipedia AKA Illogicopedia, infamously known for it's spread of misinformation, held a blackout in retaliation against Uncyclopedia for issuing its own blackout on January 18 in heroic support of destroying the vile of the internet. Supreme Wikipedia Overlord Jimbo Wales stated that he would do whatever it takes to protect online piracy and destroy free knowledge, as well as the free world. Contrary to popular belief, Uncyclopedia actually initiated the blackout first while Wikipedia retaliated.
After much disarray and chaos typical of Wikipedia, Jimbo and his supreme senate ruled in favor of copying Uncyclopedia and issued the blackout, unintentionally causing the shutdown of global teenage operations of vandalizing and plagiarizing Wikipedia for 24 hours.
Details of the blackout that Wikipedia blatantly plagiarized are its stylishly piano-black web banner, (pictured) also announcing its reasons for shutdown. Wikipedia stated that the protest was authorized against Uncyclopedia's support of SOAP to cleanse the internet of Bronies and Lolcats and to ultimately reveal the evil corruption of Wikipedia. Furthermore, Wikipedia eliminated the grammar and spelling error that was on Uncyclopedia's banner, but Uncyclopedia had purposely done this to mock Wikipedia's psychotic obsession with Spell check.
Despite their efforts, Wikipedia has significantly lower web traffic in comparison to Uncyclopedia, and their blackout was considered a failure while Uncyclopedia's was a huge success due to the masses of people in search of Wiki porn that saw the banner before disgustedly clicking the back button. For a whole day, brave Uncyclopedians survived without Oscar Wilde or AAAAAAAAA! for the greater good of cleansing the internet.
A U.S. congressman stated:
|I really couldn't give a damn about the whole Wikipedia blackout thing, but when I saw that Uncyclopedia was shut down, I just couldn't believe it! I need to get my daily fix for Kitten Huffing to give my best effort as a congressman, and there it was, instead of that wonderful picture of a man snorting a kitten up his nose, the site was clad in a stylish piano-black hue! So yesterday I decided to put down the martini and take action for Uncyclopedia's cause. I think that with our combined efforts, we can push SOAP through!|
With Lady Sophia declaring victory while Wikipedia admitted defeat, both sites reverted to their web pages after 24 hours while Lord Jimbo promised revenge. Meanwhile, Encyclopedia Dramatica proceeded to suck penis.
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|