UnNews:Uncle Duke is the father of Anna Nicole's baby
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Uncle Duke is the father of Anna Nicole's baby
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Monday, July 25, 2016, 02:29:UTC)(
11 April 2007
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HIGH OVER THE ATLANTIC OCEAN IN A PRIVATE PLANE -- In a strange turn of events, the real father of Anna Nicole's baby wasn't even in the Bahamas. Instead, the father was in Washington D.C.
Uncle Duke former writer to Rolling Stone, governor of American Samoa, ambassador to China, spokesperson for the NRA, a hostage for Iran, drug smuggler, former presidential candidate in the 2000 election, and current (soon to be former) Democratic lobbyist is the father of Anna Nicole's baby.
We caught up with the lobbyist yesterday for a quick interview. He said, "I remember her. When I helped rebuild New Orleans back in late 2005, she helped raise money for recovery efforts and came down to see the damage. We meet, but I don't remember much after that."
Puzzling for some and for many news agencies who has been following the news story for the last two months and many question still remain unresolved. With the shocking conclusion announced, Uncle Duke vows to get Bahamas citizenship and live in Anna's former home with his new daughter. "I will make sure that I will be the best father I can be."
Uncle Duke will also try to receive part of the settlement from oil barron and former Anna Nicole husband, Howard J. Marshall. "She needs to get part of the money and show how great her mother was."