Trump puts reporterette in her place

Every time you think, you weaken the nation —Moe Howard

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15 August 2015

Megyn Kelly

Kelly, who does not appear to be a fat pig, refused a reporter's inquiry as to whether she was on-the-rag when she provoked Trump.

ATLANTIC CITY, New Jersey -- Multibillionaire-turned-Presidential-candidate Donald Trump has just given Fox News reporterette Megyn Kelly her "come-uppance."

In response to an adversarial question from Kelly, Trump reportedly replied, "Come back later when you get off the rag."

Trump's actual retort was a more delicate remark better suited to the world of politics, which merely referred to the emission of bodily fluids. Trump himself is the only Presidential candidate in American history whose own name suggests excreta, though not to Americans. "Megyn" is a common Welsh given name, with a women's-lib spelling to suggest gynecology.

Republican Party insiders were in high dudgeon over the wisecrack, and demanded that Trump undergo a 12-step re-education campaign, as if he were some baker who refused to write pro-gay propaganda when icing a cake. Trump replied that "It doesn't necessarily work that way," and said that, in business, flexibility is key.

Donald Trump 1

Candidate Trump was under-the-rag during the interview.

Erick E. Erickson promptly disinvited Trump from his "Red State Gathering," where conservative activists meet to titter about menstruation. He said Trump's remarks about flexibility show that he is unsuited to be the Republican standard-bearer, and that in reality looking nice and moderate is key, as is maintaining a huge federal bureaucracy while posturing about "zeroing out" tiny pieces of it. He said his Gathering would surely deliver a surprise invitation to Mitt Romney to run again.

However, members of the Tea Party movement, who mostly do not know what either "dudgeon" or niceness is, applauded Trump's remarks. Some suggested that anyone who can stand up to a slick Washington info-babe could stare down Nancy Pelosi or call Angela Merkel a bitch when she crosses America. One of them hoped, if Candy Crowley returns to moderate one of the 2016 Presidential debates and again says the Democrat is "correct" when he is lying, that Trump would reach over and rip her bra off.

Trump has previously called women "fat pigs, dogs, and disgusting animals." No one remembers what Kelly originally asked Trump to get him so fired up.

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