UnNews:Term 'darkies' may be discriminatory, UN body warns Canada
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Term 'darkies' may be discriminatory, UN body warns Canada
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, December 1, 2015, 14:59:UTC)(
9 March 2007
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OTTAWA, Ontario -- United Nations Committee on Nazism, Racism and Huffing has suggested that the future American state called Canada, consider not labelling all people of non-UK extraction as 'darkies', as it may be a tad discriminatory. The committee then politely asked the Canadians if they could maybe, please, use the term, 'light darkies' or even 'tannies' in referencing their immigrants and native people.
One committee spokesman Queen Amidala of Austria, who was the lone dissenter of the recommendation, took a much firmer stance, "I was not elected to watch my people who have emigrated to a new country be referred to by those backwards hickwads as 'darkies', 'brownies' or 'cupcakes'. Canada is by far the most fucktardingly racist nation, save for those filthy Dutch, of course."
The US ambassador to Canada, Lando Calrissian, was quick to defend the dirty Canucks. "Look. We have a deal with the Canadian Empire. They've agreed to stop using the term 'darkies' on the condition we give them a device called a 'Skywalker'. We're still not sure what they mean by 'cupcake' or 'brownie'... does anyone here speak Canadian?"
Canadian Prime Minister of the week, and self proclaimed Emperor, Stephen Harper was not as quick as Lando in defending his country, but considering how he normally responds, it was lightningly quick. "Let me just put an end to this confusion. It seems a staffer here at the Prime Minister's office, as a prank, submitted some recipes to the United Nations instead of the required paperwork. Of course, we Canadians don't refer to some of the people in our multi-cultural society as 'darkies'. We stick with the terminology they use themselves, like nigg.."
At that moment the Emperor's mike was cut.
Mace Windu could not be reached for comment. But he's pissed.
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