UnNews:Teenage Girl smashes computer monitor in Royal Bank
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Teenage Girl smashes computer monitor in Royal Bank
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Thursday, January 19, 2017, 11:25:UTC)(
4 April 2009
SMARMY GLEN, Scotland -- A 17-year-old today pleaded guilty to smashing a computer monitor in the middle of the Royal Bank of Scotland, after the G20 protests. She also pleaded guilty of additonal charges of using a keyboard to smash a window.
“She got on a desk and was going to use a keyboard to smash her way out of the building.”
Sources say that by smashing the window, she enabled G20 protestors to storm the building, who then each effectively wiped out all the remaining computers in the building before getting drunk on 4 cans of heavy lager.
The prosecutor stated that the reason she smashed the computer was through peer pressure, beer, and because her boss was an asshole and therefore it was not the teenager's fault. The prosecutor was hereby fired for supporting the wrong person.