UnNews:Syria and Egypt invade Jerusalem
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Syria and Egypt invade Jerusalem
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, August 20, 2017, 10:03:UTC)(
7 September 2006
Cairo, Egypt -- Egyptian president Hosny Mubarak announced that 2500 Egyptian soldiers met 1000 Syrian soldiers at South Beirut and already started invading Jerusalem, Israel. Mubarak announced that the invasion was due to the blockage of Lebanese air and seaport. Mubarak said that the invasion will end within 3 months.
"We are in very unpleasant situation. We have decided that the invasion was inevitable. It is an invasion to save Arab nations from Israel and U.N forces. The purpose of this invasion is to destroy Jerusalem and other major cities of Israel so that Israel cannot have a power to deal with Arab nations." Mubarak said. Still, no answers came from the president of Syria, but Mubarak also declared of unconditional release of 800 prisoners kept in Israel.
Israeli prime minister, Ehud Olmet organized an immideate conference with heads of Israel and discussed how to prevent the invasion. According to one head, Tracey Emrick said that Israel will negotiatie with Egypt and Syria to stop the invasion. "We are in real danger. Our soldiers didn't return from Lebanon and we only have less than 1000 soldiers defending a border." Said Olmet in depressed expression. According to the border guard, Egyptian and Syrian soldiers already reached to Nazareth. The armies already invaded Haifa and terminated every soldiers, but no damages were upon citizens.
Mubarak announced that 300 bombing planes will fly to Jerusalem in less than 2 days, and will start a real invasion towards Israel. Israeli heads already contacted the soldiers staying in Lebanon and requested them for an immideate retreat to Jerusalem.
U.N Secretary Genral Kofi Annan is now missing and has not been seen for 36 hours. U.N suspects that this is the action made by remnants of Hizbollah and Egypt. So far, no traces of Kofi Annan has been found, but U.N opened a conference and said that they will try to find Kofi Annan as fast as possible. U.N announced that they will send 2000 soldiers to Jerusalem to protect Jerusalem from 3500 soldiers from Egypt and Syria.