UnNews:Sumatran tiger saves man
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Sumatran tiger saves man
Straight talk, from straight faces
Thursday, June 30, 2016, 02:55:UTC)(
23 March 2010
JAKARTA, Indonesia -- A rare Sumatran tiger dragged a man out of a fight in an Indonesian village and saved his life from friends who had tried to kill him, an official said Monday.
The 26-year-old man, identified as Darmilus, was attacked Sunday while he and seven friends were playing cards in a makeshift hut in Seponjen village near the protected Berbak National Park, a known tiger habitat.
The seven friends lost over 2 million Indonesian Rupiah to Darmilus, and, feeling cheated, set upon the man with intent to kill him and recover their lost fortune.
“Darmilus was being beaten close to the door when a Sumatran tiger suddenly grabbed him and dragged him outside”, said Nurazman, an official with Jambi Province conservation agency. “His friends managed to pursue him but the tiger fought them off.”
“After chasing away the seven would-be murderers, and attending to Darmilus’ wounds, the tiger finally ran away, leaving him at the nearest Church of Good Hope”, said Nurazman, who just wouldn’t shut up.
Local authorities are investigating why the friends, who were fellow construction workers, tried to kill Darmilus, but concluded their investigation as soon as they learned of the 2 million Rupiah that Darmilus had won.
According to one unidentified policeman, “Darmilus beat these men out of a fortune. And who would not kill to recover such a vast sum?”
The Sumatran tiger is the most dangerous tiger in the world, largely because of its hatred for bullies as well as its sense of fair play. The destruction of the tiger’s forest habitat for large wood and small nuts plantations has only increased cases where victims of crime were saved by a tiger. The government says only about 250 of the tigers are left in the wild.