UnNews:Something unimportant happens
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Something unimportant happens
The news outlet with approval higher than Congress
Thursday, March 22, 2018, 16:20:UTC)(
13 December 2006
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NOWHERESVILLE, THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE- The world remained unshaken today, as an unimportant incident failed to rock, or even arouse the attention of, humanity. The incident happened sometime, someplace. I guess some guy was involved, though I doubt even he cared if he was or was not. To be honest, this writer is unsure that the incident is even worth mentioning. So anyway, the incident was pretty unimportant. I doubt it is even worth labelling what happened an 'incident', since nothing really happened.
So, yeah, I don't know.. did the incident rock you? It didn't rock me. Not one bit. Nada. Zilch. Nuthin. I certainly remained unshaken by the whole thing. Don't even get me started on how this incident won't affect me psychologically, or how it will leave no long-term damage whatsoever. I've seen pieces of shit that were more important than this incident.
I guess since this is a news article, I should add some quote or something.
"The mystic cave zone certainly has nothing to do with this," remarked some guy I know, "I don't think anything in the world has anything to do with this. Is this even anything? You should cram the article with a bunch of links so people keep their eyes on it. And a Mr T template that remarks on how T pities something."