UnNews:Shit That Pisses Me Off:Harley Davidson Financial Services

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
UnNews Logo Potato

This editorial is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-moron misinformation. You can bloody well piss off if you don't like it!


12 November 2010


Columnist: Editorial biker Mr. Road Glide
Biker, Harley-Davidson
Earth tranny

Angry biker has a few choice words for Harley-Davidson.

Hello, Hello -- I once loved the Harley Company.

Harley Davidson Financial Services is Harley Davidson's Finance company. It is owned and operated by Eagle Mark Bank. If you have ever dreamed of owning a true American Harley Davidson ( built with parts made in China) or great Harley apparel ( Almost all made in China), the salesperson will want you to open an account with Harley Credit. This will be the worst mistake of your life.

This company displays all the signs of domestic terrorism ring. Once you sign your contract(with your life) these fuckers will call your friends, your work, your wife's work, your in-laws that already hate you and that whore that you stiffed out of $50 10 years ago. They will go to the white pages and call everyone in your neighborhood looking for you. This torture will continue until you pay off your new pride and joy.

Making a payment is easy, just pay them an extra fee to make an online payment, or an operator payment, then 3-5 days after you make your payment the calls will stop for around 20 days then the cycle will start again. If you send a check and it is one day late, or if they hold on to your check for 3-5 days which is usual, they will hunt you down like a Lion does prey.

Since this is an American company trying to help good American's with the worst economic down turn in history, they will liberate your motorcycle from you if you are 30 days past due. Don't worry as long as you pay the repo company and a hefty fee you can get your American Thunder back. Of course this won't stop the calls at all hours and locations including in your bathroom while you are taking a shit.

There is no other motorcycle in the world like a Harley Davidson. If there was Harley would sue them and have them put out of business, then piss on the remains, but I enjoy the motorcycle none the less.

Someday I will own my Road King that these cocksuckers have a lien on, and I will be finally happy. If you really want a Harley and you can finance with anybody else (including the Devil), you will save yourself a world of pain that many are in now.

Fuck Harley Davidson Financial Services and Fuck Harley Davidson for letting these assholes us such shitious tactics to their Loyal riders. By the way Harley is laying off a butt load of workers in Milwaukee because they are bullies and don’t give a fuck about anyone but themselves.

edit Sources

UnNews Logo Potato
This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.
Personal tools