UnNews:Search for Black Box spreads further

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4 April 2014

Blackbox03

They're out there somewhere.

PERTH, Australia -- The international hunt for the lost Black Box is now focused in an area off the coast of Australia, according to recent music reports.

The Italian music trio, well-known for their songs Ride on Time, Ride on Time (Extra Dub Mix) and Ride On Time (Let's Make More Dosh Mix), went missing, years ago, but it has taken this long for anyone to notice. Now, an international flotilla of ships, aircraft, and pedalos have been diverted from looking for a missing plane to find something much more interesting to pop pickers.

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Commander Shawnsky:"I'm onto shomeshing. Turn up the bass".

"Black Box went missing years ago," said musician Cmdr. Justin Timberlake, now aboard the Russian submarine Crimea River to help with the backing vocals. "Ever since it was revealed that Katrin Quinol, the woman gyrating on the videos, was lip-synching and couldn't screech a note, Black Box dropped out of public view. Now I think we are close to finding them, thanks to Commander Ivan Shawnsky, who said he has heard something ping on the radar."

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Latest technology deployed to find old techno group.

The search is being coordinated by International Federation of Phonogram and Videogram Producers (IFPI) with the help of Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) and Jay-Z. Music experts think the likelist location of Black Box is somewhere off the coast of Australia, an area well-known for its belated adaptation of abandoned music trends. However, wreckage from ABBA tribute bands, Kylie Minogue, and INXS is said to be hampering the investigation.

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No one is looking for Katrin Quinol. Shame.

"Australia's backwater music status is really buggering up the look for Black Box. God knows why anyone wants to find them, but I guess there must be a music deal involved," said one disgruntled searcher.

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