UnNews:Scooter Libby takes up Smoking

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8 March 2007

Smokingscooter

Scooter Libby displays his new pasttime


Washington, D.C. -- In an effort to improve his image, convicted felon Scooter Libby has taken up smoking. "I did it to make myself look older", said Mr. Libby. "With a name like 'Scooter', everybody thinks I'm a little boy. I really hate that nickname. Anyway, my teenage son told me that smoking would make me look more grown up. I thought I'd give it a try.".

Scooter Libby is in dire need of an image makeover after being convicted by a jury of his peers for being a member of the Bush administration. This makes him a liar, by default and therefore, eligible for conviction under American perjury laws.

"I just hope it ticks off the leftist, pinko commies that are out to get me," Scooter said during a phone interview today. "They hate smokers. And the added benefit is that the cigarettes can be used as currency in the big house!"

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