UnNews:Scientists retrace waves to their source
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||We distort, you deride|
24 February 2009
Chinatown - Australia — Australian scientists have been working for the last eight years to answer one of the most stunning questions that an average person has: "Where do waves come from?"
Last week in a televised interview Australian professor Yushi Samolushi and Australian maritime scientist Mahmoud Bin Younes explained that they have finally come to concrete results in their search by proving that waves actually originate in the sea and not in Antarctica as folks used to believe furthermore penguins flapping their wings in the water doesn't appear to be the source. His words caused some murmuring among the listeners, some people were whispering "blasphemy". The doctor continued by explaining that waves are actually the result of heavy windstorms caused by Butterfly effect from Mexico where butterflies are known to live all year-long.
Critics suggested that the research center reviews his results and analysis as a claim of that magnitude is pretty much hard to swallow, a scientist from Sydney said upon hearing the news "If their claims are proved to be true then we have no more reason to keep the penguins, we'll just hunt them all". Linux rushed to claim protection for Tux, the Linux mascot who dwells in Antarctica most of the year to take advantage of the free snacks provided by the Australian governments and to enjoy a Windows-free environment.
Australia is known to have a top-notch center to preserve wild penguins and increase their numbers to allow higher waves and economy boost through wave-surfing, the government might have to review his funding and perhaps transfer the protection to Mexican butterflies instead, a preposition that the board says will be looking into when such a time comes but until then the scientists are facing charges that might reach stoning for blasphemous claims if they are proved wrong.
UnNews correspondent in Beirut, Lebanon.
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|