UnNews:Rafael Nadal Thinks He Disappointed Millions By Losing French Open
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||Your A.D.D. news outl — Oooh, look at the pictures!|
9 June 2009
PARIS, France -- After losing his first French Open match in four years, a somber Rafael Nadal apologized Sunday for disappointing his "millions and millions of fans," a comment many are calling a gross overestimation of his popularity and overall effect on people's everyday lives.
'"The people all have faith in me, and I let them down," said Nadal, seemingly unaware that most people were oblivious to the fact that he lost the match, that the French Open was taking place, and that the French Open is a professional tennis tournament. "In the end, it's the (maybe 500 at most) fans who really push me to succeed."
When asked if he was disappointed that Nadal had lost in the early rounds of the tournament, Kansas City, MO resident Dale Sullivan, 48, replied "Who the hell is Rafael Nadal? Sounds like someone who works at Home Depot". Rafael, still unaware that he is still less famous than local grocery store manager Steve MacKinson, has set out to rebound at next year's French Open. The majority of the world is indifferent.
- CHRISTOPHER CLAREY "Nadal Is Stunned, Losing Where He Feels Most at Home". New York Times, May 31, 2009