UnNews:Radio star Michael Savage assassinated
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||Your A.D.D. news outl — Oooh, look at the pictures!|
30 September 2008
At his arraignment, a tearful Video, born Giacomo Videttoro, told District Court Judge Terrence P. Knight that after hearing weeks of vicious attacks by Savage against immigrants, he "just snapped." Under the pretense of writing jingles for Savage's radio show, he lured the star pundit to an abandoned studio, where he brutally stabbed him forty-six times.
"Now, it seems so long ago," a distraught Video told the court.
Video originally attempted to flee the scene, but soon realized he had to turn himself in.
"In my mind," a tearful Video told the judge, "while I was in my car, I realized, this isn't something I can rewind. I've... I've gone too far."
Video then broke down entirely. "Oh, ah-ah-ah-oh," he sobbed.
Judge Knight had little sympathy for the remorseful murderer.
"I understand you've been in contact with the victim's family?" he asked.
"I met his children." sniveled Video.
"What did you tell them?" demanded Knight.
Video broke down into sobs a second time. "Oh, ah-ah-ah-oh!"
Video's preliminary hearing is set for October 23, 2011.