UnNews:Queensland government to start using recycled water
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Queensland government to start using recycled water
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, July 31, 2016, 09:35:UTC)(
30 January 2007
In a controversial move, the Queensland government (Australia) has decided to use recycled water for drinking. Originally a vote was to take place to see whether the people wanted to drink their own waste: however, this was scraped because of the crisis of the drought.
Needless to say, many have swarmed over the idea, but perhaps the most quotable of all has come from two popular national radio broadcasters who had the following to say.
Now whenever you flush the loo, it's not see you later, it's see you soon.
Though many shudder at the taste of drinking their own urine, the Government insists there is nothing wrong with the water, and say that the yellow colouring is out of their control. To prove this, a test was conducted on 15 people with one glass filled with recycled water, the other with current tap water. A taste, visual and smell test was conducted with the following result:
For the taste test, 7 of the participants couldn't tell which was recycled, 5 guessed which was recycled, and the other 3 said the recycled tasted remarkably similar to the dinner they had last night if it had been off and liquidised.
For the visual test 14 of the participants could tell which was recycled, however the lone participant who could not tell was later discovered to be colour blind.
For the smell test, 12 could tell which was recycled, and the other 3 could not. However, it was later discovered that they had a cold, which would also explain why they thought the contents of both glasses tasted like their own mucus.
The Government is urging other states to follow suit, and start using recycled water for drinking. The New South Wales and Victorian governments have already refused, however, the vast majority of the right-heads of the Tasmanians don't seem to mind.
Though state elections for Queensland are still years away, word has spread that the Labour Government will use the following catch-phrase at the next election: Labour. Making sure your waste doesn't go to waste.
The complete guide to results; Queensland edition. January 25, 2006