UnNews:Qaddafi is new rebel leader, NATO flummoxed
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Qaddafi is new rebel leader, NATO flummoxed
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Friday, February 12, 2016, 01:24:UTC)(
4 September 2011
TRIPOLI, Libya -- Former Libyan dictator, Muammar Qaddafi, is now the new leader of the Libyan rebels, and NATO commanders are seriously confused about who they should support. “The real power in Libya belongs to the Libyan rebels!” A NATO spokesperson told AP, “But now we are totally flummoxed because all of a sudden Qaddafi is the new leader of the rebels.”
Saif Gaddafi, the rebel leader’s son, told CNN: “Just see the folly! How crazy can NATO be?” He asked without receiving any believable response. “Al Qaeda, who are the sworn enemies of America and Europe, and the entire non-Muslim world, have succeeded in tricking NATO and America into helping them establish their terrorist center here in Libya!” Saif Qaddafi stressed. “And NATO acted as the free Air Force and central bankers to enable al Qaeda terrorists to succeed.
“And as a result the terrorists appear to have overthrown the legal, constitutional government of my father!” He continued. “Before, electricity and water were FREE to all Libyans, but now there is no electricity or water and anarchy and terror rule the streets. Tripoli has become a living hell... all because NATO helped their sworn enemy, al Qaeda, to succeed in terrorizing Libya. It is so bloody stupid!”
A NATO spokesperson told CNN that their drive to aid the Libyan rebels in overthrowing the Qaddafi regime was on the verge of success when suddenly Qaddafi, the very person they were trying to oust, was now head of the Rebels, and he was demanding air support as promised. “Now we are bombing al Qaeda under the direction of the new rebel leader, Muammar Qaddafi; it is all so confusing!”
But Saif Qaddafi was not at all confused, “These NATO idiots have been bamboozled by the al Qaeda terrorists in their phony guise as rebels, but now it is our turn to get NATO support and reclaim Libya from this absurd occupation by terrorisms’ number one organization,” he pointed out. “Now we are the rebels so NATO is supporting us!”
An American military spokesperson confirmed that, indeed, Muammar Qaddafi was now leading the Rebels in Libya with full NATO cooperation and air cover. “We have to wipe out every one of those stinking al Qaeda, and we’ll continue using the rebel alliance to succeed!”
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|