UnNews:President Bush declares 'Kenya have weapons of mass destruction'
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President Bush declares 'Kenya have weapons of mass destruction'
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Saturday, May 28, 2016, 13:01:UTC)(
8 April 2006
George Bush warns the people of America 'Stay away from Kenya!'
George Bush shocked the people of America by announcing that he believed Kenya (A country Northwest of France) held weapons of mass destruction. He demanded an immediate apology from the country and a pet lion. It is unknown as of yet what the Kenyan Prime minister's response was, or who he is, but he is believed to have refused. President Bush warned Americans to kill any civilian who could be Kenyan, and to watch out for people with slanted eyes and chop sticks. The president's Lawyers later appologised for the racist Chinese remark, reminding people only to kill African-Americans.
The British Prime minister Elizabeth Duke the second refused to join the war, yet Queen Tony Blair supported Bush's actions. President Bush had this to say; 'This kind of behavior cannot be tolerated. I fully support my idea to invade Iraqzerland, and with the help of Ingyland country, I believe that we can help stop poverty in schools for at least 2 years'
edit History of Kenya
The small town of Kenya Jannia (Found in Italyazakhztan) has a history of having weapons of mass destruction,from an outrage in 2004 where the town managed to shift the blame onto Iraq, or Iraquazerland, and then again in 2006, when the President refused to give the American Prime minister of the time, Jabba the Butt, an apology and a lion.
edit Urgent update
Although it has yet to be confirmed, the death toll is thought to be a massive 10 billion dead. President Bush is now demanding a Unicorn in addition to his previous demand of a lion.
More on the story as it unfolds.