UnNews:Potatoes launch non-violent takeover
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|This article is part of UnNews||Straight talk, from straight faces|
26 July 2006
Potatoes everywhere are rising up and taking farmers, shoppers and markets by storm. People everywhere are advised to retreat to their homes, close all windows with curtains drawn and lock all doors while the government makes efforts to create a peace agreement.
When asked about the safety of the lorry driver, Yabari Solanu, spokespotato for the cause, said "We want this world takeover to go as smoothly as possible, with very few casualties. The safety of your human is guaranteed for now, but we must keep him for... insurance purposes." The hostage has tried to be rescued, it has been confirmed, but the efforts have been abandoned for "diplomatic reasons". Solanu was unavailable for further comment.
- ""I expect lots of potato based jokes about this one"". Smartie, July 26, 2006