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24 December 2008
Vatican City - Pope Benedict has recently declared that homosexuals are destroying the rainforest.
"How can you people just sit and stare at me while the rainforests are decaying as we speak?!" the pope said in a holiday address to Catholics. "The tropical forests deserves our protection. These homosexuals are fagging it up beyond repair!"
The pope then preceded to pull his clothes off and run into the cold Italian night yelling, "Goddamn, I need to save the rainforest!"