UnNews:Papal kiss causes miracle

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Papal kiss causes miracle

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23 November 2015

PopeFrancisKissing

Youngsters in the receiving line have begun addressing everything from appeal with the girls to gluten intolerance with some papal "practice."

PHILADELPHIA, Pennsylvania -- Two months ago, Joey and Kristen Masciantonio say they experienced a miracle when Pope Francis spontaneously kissed their one-year-old daughter, Gianna, on the head.

Gianna has a rare, inoperable brain tumor, but recent scans show barely any sign of it. "This must be the cause," says father Joey. "We've done nothing else in the last two months that would account for it — except the magnetic bracelets and changing her to the all-banana diet."

What's more, the man who held Gianna for the Pope is bodyguard Domenico Giana — and Gianna's older brother is named Dominic, surely another sign of divine intervention. Joey spent a recent evening seeking more signs from God. Incredibly, a quarter came up heads on sixteen straight tosses. Mathematicians at the University of Pennsylvania who performed calculations say the odds against this happening naturally are in the "tens of thousands."

"She’s blowing kisses and starting to point at things,” mother Kristen told Eyewitness News. Gianna was named for St. Gianna, a modern-day saint. Saint Gianna’s daughter was in Philadelphia and met little Gianna during the papal weekend.

The one-year-old has been invited to Washington, D.C. to discuss her family's theories of causation with a committee of Congress discussing global warming.

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