UnNews:Overly Literal Internet Creep Stalks Facebook

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
Overly Literal Internet Creep Stalks Facebook

Straight talk, from straight faces

UnNews Logo Potato
Friday, March 23, 2018, 04:09:59 (UTC)

F iconNewsroomAudio (staff)Foolitzer Prize

Feed-iconIndexesRandom story

20 February 2007


Randy DiGuiletto on a good day

Recently, serial rapist and internet stalker Randy DiGuiletto began to stalk the popular social networking site Facebook, in a misguided attempt to Facebook stalk.

I heard a lot about Facebook and decided to check it out," said DiGuiletto, 45. "It didn't take me long to find its uniform resource locater. With a quick bit of research I was able to discover its IP address as well. Sometimes I'll ping its server just to see the response. Pinging the server is only the beginning though. If all goes well, I'll be fingering it in no time, and maybe even tunneling inside of its secure socket layer.

Of course, DiGuiletto is quick to defend his actions.

"A lot of times, these web sites will really tease you. They are so cool but at the same time they are so closed up due to everyone liking them that there are very few cracks in their facade. They are not easy to break into or break down. However, an expert like me knows a trick or two about catching a glimpse of things the website doesn't expect you to see, without it being any the wiser. With Facebook, I happen to know that there are two numbers which can be checked out if the cursor is held over the "20" and the "07" in "2007" at the bottom of every page in the copyright line. The fact is, Facebook gives you a glimpse of these numbers because it's actually a lot more insecure than it lets on. From there it can be broken down and gotten into, no doubt. You just have to figure out where to go from there. All web sites are the same. They all have holes that they are waiting for you to find, and their lack of security make these holes much easier to get into."

There has recently been a lot of criticism over Facebook and its accessibility. Some people feel it is becoming too "open" and just letting anyone in. Expert web site administrator Daniel Gaul, however, feels that this is natural. "When a web site reaches about two or three years in age, it is natural for it to open up more. When a web site is especially popular, the number of people who want to get inside of it may encourage it to open up more. It's a perfectly normal process and as long as the web site makes sure that the users can't hurt it, then there is no need to worry."

Others, however, disagree. "I remember when Facebook had standards. It would only let college kids inside of it. Now high schoolers, old people and anyone who lives in a city or region can join! It lets everyone inside! It makes all of us college students and original users feel worthless because now we see how low the bar really is," stated John Brown, a senior at Penn State University.

To people like DiGuiletto, Facebook is better open. "Like I said, the more open the better. The more open the easier to get inside, I always say. Eventually maybe the website will mature like Amazon or Ebay or Google, and be popular but extremely hard to get inside, but for now, it's in the prime of its life, and it's easy to exploit its insecurities."

Personal tools