UnNews:Nothing unusual happens

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Nothing unusual happens

Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?

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Wednesday, March 21, 2018, 15:31:59 (UTC)

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28 April 2007


Not even one puny flying saucer...

News reporters the world over have hit a crisis as nothing unusual happens today. This non-event has happened in the past but has always been covered up by reporting boring everyday occurrences like people being killed, but today little or no effort has been put into filling up news space. A BBC news reporter, who wishes to remain anonymous, confided that he "just couldn't be bothered any more". An employee of CNN seemed to be of the same opinion. In an exclusive interview with UnNews, our source said:

"What's the point?. So some more people died; big deal. Oh yes and I could write another story on global warming; 'Global warming still probably a threat. Watch CNN for up-to-the-minute updates over the next fifty years'. Great story."

Even UnNews itself had struggled to find anything to report on on this most boring of days, but luckily it is blessed with having the greatest journalistic minds of the world in its employ, who have sweated blood to write these measly 7 lines and create an article for today. Maybe it should think about paying us...

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This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.

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