UnNews:North Korea's Fireworks Blow
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
North Korea's Fireworks Blow
Straight talk, from straight faces
Tuesday, May 26, 2015, 10:36 (UTC)
4 July 2006
North Korea got into the American patriotic spirit this July 4th by putting on the world's largest fireworks display. When Thomas Jefferson wrote to somebody or other that "there ought to be fireworks ... cause I like fireworks" he could never have envisioned the grand scale of this atom-splitting state-of-the-art nuclear pyrotechnics display put on by North Korea this year. They fired seven ballistic bottle rockets including the long-range Toe iPod Pong 2 (you can play a demo version at next year's E3) on Tuesday. The tests were criticised by officials from several countries, particularly Japan, South Korea and the United States. One official was reported as saying, "No dip, sherlock!" The UN Security Council held a closed meeting today to discuss sponsoring next year's North Korean fireworks display.
A North Korean foreign ministry official, Lee Byong Dork, acknowledged the tests while speaking to reporters in Pyrongyang, where he said, "American indpendence was an issue of national sovereignty, and other countries do not have the right to judge. We are not bound by any agreement regarding fireworks." Oddly, North Korean media made no mention of the launches.
Australian foreign minister Alexander Downer said Wednesday that "there could be one or two or maybe three or four or five or six or seven or maybe a hundred more" launches of short or medium-ranged missiles.
Major South Korean newspaper reported Thursday that the Apocalypse had begun.
The missile launches comes five days after US president George W Bush, after talks with Japanese Prime Minister Idontcare Howyousaymyname, warned North Korea on test-launching a long range missile.