UnNews:Niagara Falls loses job

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[[Image: Niagara2.jpg‎|right|thumb|300px|In spite of being fired Niagara Falls just won’t quit]]
 
[[Image: Niagara2.jpg‎|right|thumb|300px|In spite of being fired Niagara Falls just won’t quit]]
   
'''NIAGARA FALLS, [[New York]]''' – [[America]]’s famous '''[[Niagara Falls]]''' waterfall has received a notice of termination of [[Job|employment]]. Authorities cite a sagging [[Economy|economy]] and slowdown in [[Marriage|honeymooners]] as the reasons for lying off the great ''wonder of nature''. The move is sure to raise tempers and lower [[Inflation|inflation]].
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'''NIAGARA FALLS, [[New York]]''' – [[America]]’s famous Niagara Falls waterfall has received a notice of termination of [[Job|employment]]. Authorities cite a sagging [[Economy|economy]] and slowdown in [[Marriage|honeymooners]] as the reasons for lying off the great ''wonder of nature''. The move is sure to raise tempers and lower inflation.
   
In spite of being fired, the '''waterfall''' has protested by continuing to work without getting paid. '''Ed Cummings''', a ''policeman'' on duty at the '''Waterfall''', told '''UnNews''', ''“It’s the economy and marriage slowdown. We just can’t afford to maintain this waterfall anymore!”'' Cummings admitted, ''“Do you have any idea how much [[Money|money]] it costs to keep this thing running?”''
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In spite of being fired, the waterfall has protested by continuing to work without getting paid. Ed Cummings, a policeman on duty at the Waterfall, told UnNews, ''“It’s the economy and marriage slowdown. We just can’t afford to maintain this waterfall anymore!”'' Cummings admitted, ''“Do you have any idea how much [[Money|money]] it costs to keep this thing running?”''
   
When it was pointed out that the ''Falls'' were working anyway, '''Cummings''' replied, ''“Hey, it’s got a mind of its own. And you can’t stop it from working for free. But I figure the waterfall will get sick and tied of dragging its ass for nothing.”''
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When it was pointed out that the Falls were working anyway, Cummings replied, ''“Hey, it’s got a mind of its own. And you can’t stop it from working for free. But I figure the waterfall will get sick and tied of dragging its ass for nothing.”''
 
When asked about the [[Park|park]] and concessions there, '''Cummings''' replied, ''“They’re all closing and we’re closing the park and all of us are leaving. So this big [[Ego|egotistical]] '''show-off''' is just going to be working for nothing and no one. And who wants to play without an audience? It’ll get fed up soon enough!”''
 
   
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When asked about the [[Park|park]] and concessions there, Cummings replied, ''“They’re all closing and we’re closing the park and all of us are leaving. So this big [[Ego|egotistical]] show-off is just going to be working for nothing and no one. And who wants to play without an audience? It’ll get fed up soon enough!”''
   
 
== Sources ==
 
== Sources ==
*{{source|url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niagara_falls
 
|title= Niagara Falls loses job
 
|author= Fern Lake
 
|pub= NYT
 
|date=March 17, 2010}}
 
 
 
{{Original}}
 
{{Original}}
   

Latest revision as of 09:16, August 12, 2011

This article is part of UnNews UnNews Logo Potato1 UnFair and UnBalanced

17 March 2010

Niagara2
In spite of being fired Niagara Falls just won’t quit

NIAGARA FALLS, New YorkAmerica’s famous Niagara Falls waterfall has received a notice of termination of employment. Authorities cite a sagging economy and slowdown in honeymooners as the reasons for lying off the great wonder of nature. The move is sure to raise tempers and lower inflation.

In spite of being fired, the waterfall has protested by continuing to work without getting paid. Ed Cummings, a policeman on duty at the Waterfall, told UnNews, “It’s the economy and marriage slowdown. We just can’t afford to maintain this waterfall anymore!” Cummings admitted, “Do you have any idea how much money it costs to keep this thing running?”

When it was pointed out that the Falls were working anyway, Cummings replied, “Hey, it’s got a mind of its own. And you can’t stop it from working for free. But I figure the waterfall will get sick and tied of dragging its ass for nothing.”

When asked about the park and concessions there, Cummings replied, “They’re all closing and we’re closing the park and all of us are leaving. So this big egotistical show-off is just going to be working for nothing and no one. And who wants to play without an audience? It’ll get fed up soon enough!”

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