UnNews:New York soda ban opposed by NAACP

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26 January 2013

JimmyMcMillan

The size of fountain sodas is too dam small

New York City, New York -- The NAACP has announced plans to sue the city of New York over Mayor Bloomberg's proposed ban of large sized fountain sodas. The ban would limit the size of non-diet sodas to 16 ounces.

"This is clearly racist a measure designed to oppress by black community," said community organizer Malcolm Washington. "For some reason, the white Jew government of New York City thinks that black and brown communities in New York City can't make mature decisions. How many white people do you see eating at a Burger King in New York City? None, the are all eating vegan kosher hummus or whatever the hell whitey thinks is cool nowdays. My point is that this law is racist and Mayor Bloomberg is a racist covetous Jew."

Noted New York political activist Jimmy McMillan responded to the situation by saying, "The price of rent is too dam high, and the size of soda is too dam small!"

Some have asserted that Coca-Cola's recent donations to the NAACP have unduly influenced the actions of the NAACP. However, the NAACP was quite to counter such accusation. "First off, the Coca-Cola donation of $100,000 and 10,000 2-Liter bottles of grape soda was a down payment for the reparations of slavery. Or maybe it was reparations for a Coca-Cola saying or doing something racist. My point is that we were owed that money for some reason," said NAACP spokesman Leroy el-Shabezz, "Second, this government proposal was created by a Republican. We always oppose Republican government initiatives, rather they are good, bad, or indifferent. The assertion of conflict of interest is therefore ridiculous."

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