UnNews:NFL Player confuses own reflection with mother
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
NFL Player confuses own reflection with mother
We distort, you deride
Saturday, April 30, 2016, 17:15:UTC)(
28 November 2008
Detroit, MI, USA - Running back LenDale White of the 11-1 Tennessee Titans had a big game on Thanksgiving, before making his second major gaffe in two weeks in a move that may lead to a suspension for the Titans star. In the waning seconds of the Titans' 47-10 win against the 0-12 Lions, White turned to the camera and said, "Hi, mom." It is a familiar moment many fans expect in the last minutes of NFL Thanksgiving Day games, where players greet their mothers who, it is supposed, are sitting at home basting their turkeys and waiting impatiently for the final moments to tick away so their babies can come home and complain the breast is a little dry.
This time was different, though. This time, Mr. White, who had 106 yards on 23 carries, continued talking to the camera. "How's everybody at home?" He continued. "Sorry, I can't hear you, it's pretty loud here in the stadium. Tell Nana not to eat all the dark meat, that's my favorite." At about this time, the cameraman had moved on to film a particularly one-sided play. "Hey, hold up for a second," said White, who ran to the bench.
What happened next is difficult to determine, as the camera was off of White for a while. Mr. White claims that the cameraman molested his mother, while cameraman Peter Ford claims that White, "Just came over with two footballs in each hand, started yelling at me, and attacked for no reason."
While it is determined what actually happened, White will be suspended from practice by Titans Head Coach Jeff Fisher until the matter is cleared up "or our next game, whichever comes first." Fisher had already had to suspend White once this year for trying to get New York Jets quarterback Brett Favre's autograph after his first quarter touchdown in the Jets first loss of the season last week. White was suspended the rest of the game by Fisher "for being a fanboy. I hate fanboys." Fisher added, "It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't run out on the field during Favre's touchdown celebration. I mean, have some pride, man!"
Despite the faux pas, the incident was only the second-most embarrassing of the afternoon game, as free agent starting Quarterback Dante Culpepper of the Detroit Lions mistakenly believed he was playing for the Titans instead until well into the second half.