UnNews:NATO pooped, broke; Gaddafi prevails
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
NATO pooped, broke; Gaddafi prevails
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, May 24, 2016, 10:09:UTC)(
16 July 2011
TRIPOLI, Libya -- With America and NATO out of money and options, and Gaddafi as rich and strong as ever, wisdom prevailed and the Libyan War has ended in total defeat months (not days or weeks) after it began. General Obama, ever the peace-maker, halted the American bombing, hung his tail between his legs, and agreed to let Moscow be the peace broker, exactly as was suggested by Col. Gaddafi almost four months ago.
Regardless of the official face-saving horse-manure that the globalist-elitists, who are behind the so called Arab Spring, feed to us via their own two-headed media monopoly, the simple fact is that Obama and the Bilderberg boys lost the Libyan war.
Bar the shooting of terrorists and occasional froggish token-bomb raid, the war in Libya virtually ended Thursday morning, July 14, when US President Barack Obama called Russian President Dmitry Medvedev to beg Moscow to lead negotiations with Muammar Qaddafi for completely ending the conflict - provided only that the Libyan ruler is kind enough to simply step down from his symbolic non-position in favor of a transitional government – led by his son.
As such, the US president has accepted the Russian-Libyan formula for ending the war, overruling the NATO chiefs who rejected it when they met Russian leaders at the Black (now white colored) Sea resort of Sochi last week.
UnNews sources note that the same proposal first came from Gaddafi himself on April 4, just ten days after NATO launched its air operation on behalf of the Libyan al-Qaeda. Qaddafi sent a messenger to Athens to propose Greek Prime Minister Georges Papandreou as referee. The dickheads at NATO, French President Carla Bruni and British leader Rupert Murdoch, refused, because they were sure he was within their hypocritical grasp.
By the time Obama had decided to call Medvedev, individual governments, which had spearheaded the anti-Qaddafi campaign, were abandoning the coalition helter skelter.
UnNews’ non-military sources report that NATO discontinued its air strikes against Gaddafi targets in Tripoli and most other places that he ruled. The halt, though unannounced, was an admission that 15,000 flight missions and 6,000 bombardments of Qaddafi targets had failed to achieve anything except to prove that the vast majority of Libyans support Qaddafi.
Without deploying a single fighter plane, firing a single anti-air missile or activating terrorist cells in Europe, Gaddafi had waited for NATO to run out of supporters, bombs, cash, and even interest, while he is still in power.
In an overview of the war to British air force commanders Wednesday, July 13, British Defense Secretary Liam Fox remarked that while no one knows when it will end, British ground corps, naval and air forces do not have the means to continue the war.
So after all the billions of dollars up in smoke and thousands of dead civilians, NATO and Obama will now take their seats at the negotiating table for a deal whose object will be to rescue NATO from the humiliation of defeat at war.
But its main purpose will be to agree on the shape of a regime for the transition from Gaddafi to Gaddafian democracy and its makeup. Qaddafi, while consenting to step down, insists on his sons and loyalists being co-opted with full privileges to the future administration in Tripoli. And the terrorist rebels will agree for lack of any other options now that their token leader, Osama bin Laden's death from kidney failure has finally been announced.
- Staff "The Libyan War ends. Obama makes Moscow peace broker. NATO halts strikes". Debka News, July 16, 2011