UnNews:Mud, still everybody's favorite
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Mud, still everybody's favorite
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Wednesday, May 4, 2016, 21:19:UTC)(
14 September 2006
UnNews - Although he competes regularly like the other racers and makes his way down the track, everyone in the crowd knows that he is not an ordinary competitor. They cheer him on, clapping and screaming as he pops up and down through the mud. That's right Bobby Jo Tanner is legally blind and a championship racer of mud bogging.
Bobby also has cerebral palsy and "drives like crap on a normal road." "Yeah, he's 15 and me and my sister would let him take the Chevy down the country roads. I was proud of him when he hit every mail box and didn't never let up."
"The mud bogs are so sloppy and uneven it totally negates Bobby Jo's palsy. He drives the mud the straightest and the fastest. This year we have him entered at the State Fair competition." says his mother, Suzy Jane.
The mudman probably did not waste much time in getting dressed for the National Literacy Week celebrations in New Zealand, at the weekend. All he had to do was just fall and roll over to collect enough mud for his body. Despite the mud, the enthusiasm from students and teachers in New Zealnd was overwhelming. They expect the literacy rate of New Zealand to double this weekend.
In New Hampshire, like many parts of the country, they hold a competition called the Mud Bowl. This year a player for the Mount Washington Valley Hogs dove for a sideline pass against the Nashua Mud Gumbys during the final game at the annual Mud Bowl and slid 20 yards for a sloppy mud victory.
Off-roading lets kids and parents play in the mud in Indiana. "It’s called horsing around," Cruz answers. "It’s called having fun."
He continues to hammer down on the accelerator, letting his knobby tires whirl while his truck shakes and shimmies. Mud flies everywhere, even knocking over some spectators. This must be some advanced off-road technique designed to test the power and climbing ability of the vehicle. "Nope, its called muddin'," exclaimed Cruz.
- Yuri had nothin' to do with this one...