UnNews:Mountain Goat Hunting, a Popular New Sport
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Mountain Goat Hunting, a Popular New Sport
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Monday, May 25, 2015, 05:43 (UTC)
17 May 2008
Russia: A new sport has been recognized by Russia known as Mountain Goat Hunting. The Mountain Goats used are the Goats that cannot Mountain Goat Race. Most mountain goat hunters have been hunting goats since birth, so specialist recommend sending your young children to mountain goat hunting schools before they reach the age of 4.
- Only Pregnant Females can be hunted
- Do not steal from other hunters
- You may only keep the head and udders of the goat and the rest must be fed to Lions, Tigers, or Laser Tigers
- You must let the Mountain Goat have his last rights (and holly matrimony if needed to proceed to heaven)
The United States is still considering accepting Mountain Goat Hunting. In the upcoming elections John McCain and Barack Obama stated that they do not support the Goat Hunting, but Hillary Clinton says she Mountain Goat hunts in her spare time.